My DD’s dad and I split up 3.5 years ago when she was only 9 months old. We were rowing a lot and I decided that I didn’t want my daughter to be brought up in that environment, although he’s a good guy he was lazy and could be selfish in some ways.
Roll forward 3.5 years, my ex and I have a good co-parenting relationship, to the point that some people have commented that we get on ‘too well for ex’s’. We’ve both had other relationships, in fact I’m in a relationship with another guy now, my ex is currently single.
My dilemma is that my boyfriend is a wonderful guy, great to me and my daughter, treats us both very well and has a great family who treat us like their own, however I don’t feel that I have much in common with him, we’re also lacking the chemistry that I had with my ex, I care for him a lot but I wouldn’t say that I’m deeply in love for him. I almost love the life that we have together, more than I love him.
My ex recently made a comment about missing me, since he said it I feel so confused. I miss him too, I miss the chemistry that we shared and the way that we loved each other so intensely. I also sometimes regret that I ended the relationship so quickly, with hindsight I wonder if we were rowing because we had a little baby which was a huge change for us and maybe caused us to be more stressed than usual.
I can’t help but wonder whether I should stay in my current relationship because I’m with such a good guy (who adores me and I know he’d be devastated if I finished it) or whether I should end it because I’m not in love with him the way that he deserves to be loved and then maybe see about giving it another go with my ex, taking it slowly.
Has anyone had any similar experiences or can offer any advice, it would be much appreciated.