Anyone else have a wonderful platonic relationship with someone of opposite sex ?

[penelopepipsqueak]

I have a friend of 23 years, male , I'm female , and we have the best friendship ever. He's my rock , he's just saved my sight as he's an optician and I've had an optic neuritis which he spotted and took me to hospital. He makes me laugh more than anyone I've ever known in my life . I love and adore him - and it's totally platonic. He's married . Is this rare ? I've always got on with men more than women - don't know why . My best friend as a child was a male , we are still in touch but he moved to Australia 25 years ago. We're meeting up this summer as he is visiting the uk . I don't really gel with women . (And have a great women friend but she's bisexual and again - nothing sexual - just good friends)
I'm quite blokey I suppose and n my sense of humour , yet a very womanly woman - love make up and hair and dresses . I just find men more relatable somehow and more honest. I'm wondering if I'm really odd because I don't fancy many men )or women !) and I'm single - but was married for years but again - it was a platonic relationship. Had a torrid sexual relationship with a guy for 5 years so I know it can happen it just doesn't - I seem to collect friends . I love that I have male friends who are genuine and truly friends - but I rarely find anyone attractive for more . I've given up dating . I really enjoyed sex with the man I fancied but that's so rare - I just don't click with people often and I seem better at friendships than relationships.
What's wrong with me ? I'm losing hope of a romantic relationship. I'm older now and just can't see it happening. I don't think I'm gay - I'm attracted to men but not many of them ! I seem to go for slightly eccentric and quirky - never ends well.

Hi bottle - that sounds like it's not balanced friendship?

I feel my friendships with my male friends are truly friendships. Nothing more and valuable to me and them .

Hope you're ok .

I don’t think it’s wise for a good friend to examine you as his patient and he should know that as an optometrist.

Get back on your thread!

He didn't examine me 😂. He took me to hospital

@greenthumb13 🤣🤣🤣

I got quite a few really good platonic male friends. I always have done.

We've been friends , really good friends , for 23 years, nothing in the way , just an amazing friendship and one that makes me belly laugh . He's a tonic . I've been really Ill lately and he's been my light relief.

He took me to hospital. I'd have ignored the symptoms in my eye but I'd messaged him and he came the following day to take me to hospital as he recognised it was serious.

Too late poof it goes lol

What am I missing .

The other guy was a weird troll. Nothing about you!

Oh dear ! sorry mr troll

Also sounds like you're in love w your friend.

Omg no! I'm so not in love with him ! We did once kiss and it was awful! No no no ......I love him dearly but there nothing there sexually!

That's kind of why I was asking because there really is nothing sexual in it

And I wonder if im really weird !

Almost all of my friends are male and they are great. It doesn't need to be any more complicated than that.

I often read threads on here and im baffled by the collective experience which is that most men are bad in some shape or form. Sure I've met a few dickheads, but I just avoid the creeps. I've always found men easier to get along with as well, not sure why perhaps just more in common.

Yes, I've a few male friends that I'm quite close to and that I'm in regularly cintact with. Two are ex colleagues, two are from childhood, we've supported each other through marriage break ups, career changes etc and had immense fun along the way too. I'm married and my husband has no issue with my male mates, I'm also very good friends with two ex's, they are both from the same county as me though I live elsewhere now and when I moved back to nurse my mother until she passed away those two guys were incredibly supportive, they checked in daily, offered to help in any way they could, one dropped take aways to the hospital late at night when I was staying over with my mother, they know my husband and even checked with him in case there was anything I needed but wasn't telling them. In my mind gender means very little when it comes to friendship, if its genuine its good.

Why does a solid friendship mean I have to be in love with him? I'm so not . And he's so not . It's totally platonic.

Yes one of my dearest friends is a man. He is is married and I’m single but his wife is cool with me. His ex fiancé seemed a bit suspicious of me so I kind of backed off when he was with her out of respect for his partner but it’s nice now that I don’t have to do that! He lives abroad but FaceTimes me and sends me pics of his kids and is just an all round decent guy. Other people Have told me he is handsome but I just see him as a super sweet guy that I feel safe around. That’s not to say I’d walk around in front of him in underwear or put myself in weird positions but I know he doesn’t like me like that and vice Versa. As someone who had a terrible father and not so great uncles, it’s actually so nice to be liked for me by a man that doesn’t have any sexual attraction towards me.

I don’t click with a lot of people either but have collected a lot of friends who “get me” over the years but my romantic relationships haven’t fared as as well, so I know what you mean!

I did, he came to service my gas fire for my landlord 25yrs ago. We got chatting and we became firm friends. He had a wife, I had a DP. We never had anything but friendship between us, never kissed or anything and never wanted to, He was the brother I never had.

Sadly he died the day before my birthday and I miss him every day :-(

I've always made friends and got along with men rather then women. I prefer their sense of humour, they talk about more deep and interesting topics and they don't get as emotional. I'm also more 'blokey' I suppose but like you also really feminine and don't fancy many men. They have to be really special for me to fancy them, not just oh he's hot cause he has muscles.
However I tend to back off when they settle down as I don't feel comfortable having a close relationship (even if platonic) with someone who has a wife, as I believe marriages should be based on being a tightly bonded friendship. Also now I have my own husband who is my best friend And he has 3 brothers (whom I consider friends) I don't feel the need and I don't see the point in spreading myself thinly when I have everything I need at home.

I think as far as finding a relationship you have to go for someone who is friendship material, it doesn't really matter whether you have a mega strong sexual attraction as that often disappears anyway.
It seems to me that you're trying to get what you could potentially get out of a relationship with your male friend but without the commitment.

Are you afraid of fully opening up to a man?

Yes but I was good friends with both him and his wife. They saw me as a daughter figure.