My friend is in her 40s. She was dating a guy for 18 months. She experienced domestic abuse with him. He would check her phone. Contact her when she was out. Takes drugs and drinks alcohol everyday and has been a substance abuser for 20 years. He would swear at her. He swore at her family yet she stayed with him. They only broke up because her father found out the boyfriend did drugs and kicked the boyfriend out as he had moved in with them. Her family, friends and myself have all said multiple times he is not good for her. She blocked him on Facebook the other week as she said he was messaging her male friends saying she was a sl*g. She had been messaging other men inappropriately when with him as she was unhappy - she even told me this.
Yesterday he faked losing his dog. He got her involved as she was looking for the dog with him even though it is his dog. She posted about the 'lost dog' in a community group which lots of people were trying to help and coincidentally it was found by a passer by feet from her ex's house.
I get fed up with her. Everyday since they split she is needy and doesn't not like being alone so keeps messaging me. I am there for my friends but she wants me to house sit at her sisters with her for 2 weeks to look after the cats. I have work, need to walk my own dog, my partner, friends and other commitments.
Now she is in touch with this ex again no doubt she will be telling me about all the drama again with him. Once they are back together she will drop me and her friends again. She has no ties with him so why does she feel bound to him. She has always wanted to get married and have a family but refuses to work during the dating stages but expects the man to work and pay for her. She has been unemployed for a few years. Even if she got help for domestic abuse she would still go back to him. I really don't have time for all this toxic mess, I have given so much advice and support but it is always ignored.