Ghosted after our first night together now he’s back

[Caspersback]

Last year I met up with my friend. I have been friends with this man for around 10 years. Nothing like this had ever happened before. We also were not very close friends but friends nonetheless.

We met up for a drink and ending up sleeping together . I was a bit off because I couldn’t wrap my head around the fact we had done it. He seemed fine though. I wanted him to leave after and it seemed like he did too.

I sent him a cheery message that he didn’t replied to until a couple of days later. With a message about how he had been ill. Gave him the benefit of the doubt replied to his message. No reply again, after about 2 weeks of no reply I blocked him. He has now messaged me to say he’s sent me a message please unblock him.

I’m not upset because i wanted more or I had feelings for him, i’m pissed off because I thought we were friends. He was the one who kind of pushed that side of things and now look 🤔

You were off with him and kicked him out after doing the deed. The grown up thing would have been to have a discussion about what had happened.

it’s unfair to blame him for this. You also behaved poorly.

I agree with @Malificent1 from his point of view he was fine and you were off from the get go after sleeping together. Then when he didn’t reply a little you block him.

Either unblock and have a proper conversation get it sorted about what you both want going forward, or just reply saying you want no more contact and keep him blocked.

How has he messaged you if you've blocked him? Was it one of those half arsed blocks on one medium where you tried to teach him a lesson but didn't block him everywhere as you still wanted to hear from him?

Sorry - I’ve with the others on this - he was fine, he didn’t reply quick enough and you blocked him.

Would taking two weeks to reply to a message have been usual before you had sex with him? If not I can understand why you might have felt put out that a friend treated you that way.

You have received a message from him so even though you have blocked him on one channel of communication he had other options and would have been able to contact you before now if he wanted to, has he tried to or is this the first you have heard from him since last year?

If you haven't heard from him since last year then he is not your friend, you have become a casual shag and he's hoping for a replay. Do not respond, leave him blocked and move on unless you happy with an occasional no strings sex arrangement.

I also think you were the one who was off with him, wanted him to leave and then had no sympathy for him having been unwell! What were you expecting?

it seems like he had always had excuses when things went a bit wrong. I would hear from him daily before this.

Anyway he came to me with a really really far fetched story which meant he lied to me in the first place. He thought he fathered a baby then found out it wasnt his. He’s either lying now or lied then because he said he hadn’t slept with anyone in a long time when the baby would have been conceived around that time

Sounds like you're better off not having him in your life if you think he's making stuff up and he ghosted you. What's the point of getting into it again?

He sent you a message asking you to unblock him so he can send you a message??

he made another account. Messaged me off there. Then said he had sent a message from the account i blocked. If that makes sense

Well its not worth getting back into it but I was interested in what he had to say as I had known him since I was a child