Can family and friends get too involved?

[Scarlettxo]

Hey!
I need some outside perspective -

Me and my partner of 6 years have just separated for a while. We lived together and have both left the house to spend some time apart and we are staying with our mums.
Over the years we have had our fair share of ups and downs with my partner disappointing me and my family on occasion because of his behaviour. My family are very opinionated when it comes to my relationship and this plays on my mind a lot. I’ve even had people that are NOT family give their unsolicited options that I can “do better”. I suffer with anxiety and the thought of everyone gossiping makes me feel sick!

We still speak and have met up nearly once a week just to talk and sort out some stuff at the house. I miss him a lot and we have gone through some really hard times together. Deep down, he’s a lovely guy and I obviously love him for a reason - but we have separated to work on our own selves.

Is there any coming back from this for us? I always saw myself with him forever :(

I think friends and family will always try to protect you , and I’ve learned that once you tell them one bad thing your other half did, they’ll start to judge. They’ll say you should leave etc. I think talking to people who are not in the frame of your life ( here, counseling etc) is a real help. I never ever discuss my relationship now with people outside. I never ever would because I learned to keep it that way.

Over the years we have had our fair share of ups and downs with my partner disappointing me and my family on occasion because of his behaviour.

What kind of behaviour?

Also, if you have to look "deep down", I bet he's not as "lovely" as you want to believe he is.

What are the occasions where he disappoitned you and your family. There can definitely be too much involvement but it's hard to tell if that is the case here.

This thread is way too vague. What is it about him that your friends and family don't like? Why do you have to look "deep down" to agree he's actually a nice man?

I mean, to answer your question - yes, friends and family CAN be too invested. Friends and family can ALSO be the first line of defence when you find yourself with a wanker, a cocklodger and/or an abuser.