Boyfriend leaving me

[Lionessbecca]

I’m so heartbroken right now and have no idea what too do 💔 my partner went through my phone 2 days ago for some reason so I was thinking why was he going through mine so I looked through his this morning but his password had been changed and he has never never done that before .
I guessed the password anyways and had access too it .. I know how this sounds.. ridiculous I know ..

I did find out when we had a little break for 2 days he took our daughter to give me a break and had said he was at his stepdads when he was at his mates and his girlfriends house who I hate so much as this girl was just speaking inappropriately to him before which I’m upset about .

because I was on his phone he has just packed his bags before work and left me and told me it was over because I went through his phone ? I didn’t do that when he had gone through mine .? He’s said his grandad is dying so how dare I go through his phone and add stress to him but I didn’t go through everything like that and was nothing to do with his dying grandad
I don’t get what too do I’m so confused how he could even just walk away like that

From what you've said he sounds manipulative. The break up could ultimately be for the best. Hope you're OK, not a nice thing to be going through.

Bottom line - I think he was looking for an excuse to leave. You could argue the rights and wrongs of going through phones and whether it was justified for you to look at his in retaliation, but I doubt he would have left over that alone.

Either he has found someone else, or the relationship from his point of view had run its course.

There is no point driving yourself mad looking for a reason or analysing what you might have 'done wrong'.

Take the time to work through your emotions and accept the end of the relationship, and focus on what you need to do to ensure he continues to support you in the parenting of your daughter.

He was looking for a reason to break up, you gave it to him.
You will be in each others lives because you have a child together.
Who owns the home?
If you rent, who's name is on the lease?
Do you work?

Why did he look thorough your phone 2 days ago ?

Well…bid him farewell. Book him an Uber and help him pack his stuff as well. He was always looking for an excuse to leave

I have no idea why he even wanted too have a snoop through my phone I don’t get It

Thank you it’s just mentally draining .
Ive put up on my Facebook story looking for somebody who could dye my hair for me so he’s messaged saying “yeah get ready for your next one”
so I’ve just said to him your the one who has left I’m just focusing and healing myself now it doesn’t matter to you even if I was getting ready for someone (which I ain’t by the way)
and he says “oh if you’ve looked in the wardrobe I secretly threw my bag back in there and didn’t take it ,but don’t worry do yourself up I don’t care “ 😵‍💫

Yeah it’s just really confusing and draining I’ve commented also on an update of what he said to me also

I had an ex like this, constantly threatening to leave, packing his bags but never taking them. Manipulative. Just run.

I would call his bluff and say "actually I think it's a good idea, we could do with some time apart"

Then dump him, who needs that shit in your life

He sounds a nasty piece of work - everything you do - he is looking to use it against you.

To get this straight - you both have a child together - you looked through his phone and he's left you. Yet - he already went through you phone two days ago and found nothing.

It's obvious - he was looking in your phone for a reason to break up with you - when he didn't find it- he used the excuse that you looked in his phone to blame you.

He doesn't sound right in the head. I know you are hurting now - but long term he's done you a favour!

He is looking at your social media to abuse you further. Block him.

Sounds like good riddance to bad rubbish. And fir heaven's sake block him on social media.

I would dump someone as soon as they looked through my phone.
I’ve been married 20 years, and never once has he looked through my phone.
He was probably trying to find a reason to dump you, and came up short.

How old are you both, you both sound very young. He looks through you phone , you look through his. He tells you he threw a bag in the back of the wardrobe.He's just playing mind games. Its extremely childish and I couldn't be arsed with this nonsense
You have a child together so for their sake you need to work out a way in which you can coparent successfully . This is not a health relationship. Let him go.

Please tell him he needs to leave as planned.

It all sounds toxic, draining and unhealthy. Certainly not a loving relationship.