First off she made a concerted effort to prioritise herself in the home with her daughters, whom she had been doing too much running after.
She encouraged them to do more for themselves and not to expect her to be at their beck and call.
She made herself her top project and priority by looking into what was available locally to her to do.
She did evening classes like bridge, art classes, gardening classes, book clubs, things that interested her.
She joined both a tennis and golf club, leaning more towards the golf.
She put herself out there because she was determined not to remain lonely and alone.
She also didn't know when he would retire and she was worried about the way retirement might pan out for them, through the experience of some of her friends.
He's not a bad man at all fr what I was told.
But his career, himself and HIS goals have been his priority.
He had a very successful career, but in retirement the bottom line is wife is ambivalent about him and their marriage.
She doesn't seek him or his company out.
He has now taken up golf too, but she still does her own thing there too.
She loves her girls holidays and from what my friend tells me periodically, she's carved out a good life for herself.
Unfortunately you cannot wait around and hope he will somehow seek you out and make you feel less lonely.
You need to take back the control you have handed over to him and your children and start thinking of yourself.
If your purpose in his life is to run the home, have his laundry done and a meal on the table for when he comes home?
Then give your head a shake and let him sort out his own shit.
Drop the rope and focus on yourself before its too late.
At heading to 60 myself, your friends are so important for the next chapter in your life.