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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Am I crazy or is DP being abusive?

14 replies

LifeStrife · 25/07/2023 19:50

Long story short I left ex DP due to controlling and borderline EA behaviour. We have young DC.

He’s moved out but we tried to see if things would work out, he’s been on his best behaviour and I was struggling alone and stupidly hoped he’d worked on himself.

His birthday, I’d been up ill the night before but was feeling ok, just tired. I am strapped for cash but ordered an expensive takeaway and got him a good bottle of wine. He said he’d open it the next day (his bday) as it was so special. Lovely evening, went to bed, I didn’t feel he was that aroused so things tailed off and we went to sleep.

Woke up in the early hours and he was downstairs, he then came to bed and sat on his phone. I knew there was something wrong… The next morning wouldn’t cuddle and grunted when I said happy birthday. He moaned he didn’t like the peanut butter with his breakfast in bed and was off all day.

turned out he’d opened the special wine in the early hours and had a glass.

He said he’d stay over again that night if I could make more of an effort… I was really angry by this point and glad when he left.

He left the wine and I assumed he didn’t want it. This was at the weekend. I had a glass last night, cue him coming round today, checking it, having a go at me and calling me a glutton in front of kids and storming out.

I feel like I’m losing my mind.

OP posts:
Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 25/07/2023 19:51

Jesus just bloody end it.

BitOutOfPractice · 25/07/2023 19:54

So he hasn’t changed at all then?

Merryoldgoat · 25/07/2023 19:54

Just end it now.

LifeStrife · 25/07/2023 19:55

Yep, completely over, I just feel so fucking stupid for thinking he’d change. And I’m just second guessing myself again, was I in the wrong?

OP posts:
Duckafuk · 25/07/2023 19:56

Nope, bin him off.

Pinkbonbon · 25/07/2023 20:05

Life's too short to date dickheads.

toochesterdraws · 25/07/2023 20:13

Don't waste any more of your time on this dickhead.

RandomMess · 25/07/2023 20:15

Now you know. You won't think back, perhaps I should have given him another chance.

Time to run for the hills and block.

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 25/07/2023 20:34

You know you're not in the wrong.

Olika · 25/07/2023 21:06

Don't waste any more time on this person. Not healthy behaviour.

Aquamarine1029 · 25/07/2023 21:09

He's a shitbag man baby, and that's why you ended it the first time. Don't be foolish enough to try again.

SpringleDingle · 25/07/2023 21:10

Of course you are not in the wrong! He is behaving like a dick. Life is too short to put up with that shit!!

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 25/07/2023 21:16

LifeStrife · 25/07/2023 19:55

Yep, completely over, I just feel so fucking stupid for thinking he’d change. And I’m just second guessing myself again, was I in the wrong?

You're not stupid for giving him a second chance. A third or fourth though...

LobsterCrab · 25/07/2023 21:32

You are NOT in the wrong here OP.

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