Wife generally unhappy with me, constantly comparing to other family

[LB207]

My wife is generally unhappy with me, it a slow burn type of unhappiness which manifests with regular complaints about me, our lifestyle and the lifestyle of others.
She will regularly say stuff to the kids, infront of me, comparing our lifestyles. For example, she will say xxxx your friend had gone to holiday in a xxx, your friend has a new car etc and will compare it to our lifestyle. We’re ok but money is tight and we don’t have the funds for holidays etc.
I dunno what to say or think but I just feel tired of it all.
I haven’t discussed it with her because I know she will become angry or defensive. I’ll admit that everyone seems to have a better lifestyle that we do and that is my fault but I don’t really have the drive or the brains to get a promotion and change things
Mehta should I do

Does she work?

Does your wife work too?

She sounds fun. How much does she work/earn?

Are you really pulling your weight, does she have good reason to feel aggrieved. Is she having to pull your load as well, both in the home and outside?

Just curious....

On the surface she is being totally unreasonable. But there are a lot of variables. Does she work? If not, are there restrictions on her earning potential eg Imin terms.of career or because she is limited to school hours? You say you don't have motivation to earn more- that sounds like.you could but don't want to? But that is also variable - are you working in a fulfilling full time role you would have to give up to earn more or are you working part time in a dead end job?

What other things might be satisfactory or unsatisfactory to her such as childcare and household labour splits?

You need to have a conversation, to find out what is causing this.

Yes she does work. I cannot really fault her, she isn’t lazy or anything like that.
its just she likes to unfavourably compare our lifestyle to others, and she sort of rubs my nose by involving the kids, by telling the kids ‘your friends have this and we don’t.’

Maybe just sit her down and say "I can see you aren't content, and you want more out our family life. How can we both make improvements to get to where you need us to be?"

And just see what she says.

Some people just love to fucking moan, then never want to try solving problems.