My little brother (who is 25 - not so little) 'forgot' my granny's birthday this year.
He didn't really forget, because I reminded him a few times in the weeks preceding it, and 4 days before, and my dad reminded him on the day. He just couldn't be bothered to do anything about it. He drives for a living and he couldn't even be bothered to pull in to a garage for a bunch of £1.99 Chrysanths.
He lives with granny, rent free. He contributes nothing to the bills, council tax, food etc. He doesn't really help much about the house (granny is in her 80s and quite frail, but he lets her bring the logs in / go to the supermarket etc).
Last year she bought him two cars. He pleads poverty and she's a soft touch. She doesn't really mind, and I'm not sure why I do because it's nothing to do with me. She's always bunging him a tenner to go to the pub. Again, nothing to do with me.
He only moved in for 3 weeks, about 2 years ago. She'd quite like him to move out so she can have her spare room back and have people to stay. Her drive is completely full of his old bangers.
She gets fed up that his room is such a sty, but when she asked him to clean it so she could hoover he got stroppy and said it was none of her business how he keeps his room.
Granny's no angel by the way, and likes to stir by telling fibs about things that he's supposedly done or not done.
I try and keep well out of it.
The thing is, and the reason why I'm posting, is that I get on really well with my brother. He's kind, funny, generous. We have always been so close. Just recently I'm having a lot of trouble reconciling the horrible, selfish person he is with other people, with the brother I know.
I'm so upset he didn't bother about her birthday. I'm not sure why. I just hate having to admit that my little brother is a bit of an asshole I suppose! I'm not good at compartmentalising. I'm cross with him even though it's nothing to do with me, and I'll struggle to put it aside and have a nice chat next time we speak.
I suppose I walk on eggshells a bit because if I did bring it up he'd be stroppy and defensive and tell me to mind my own.
If anyone has managed to trawl through all that ramble, I'd really appreciate an objective view on the situation.