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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Helping someone who is heartbroken

3 replies

TaigaSno · 20/07/2023 17:51

As the title says - I'm trying to support a friend who very recently had her heart broken.
Reasonably long marriage, husband has left, no other party involved, he just wasn't happy in the relationship - that's been the case for a long time I believe - whereas my friend believed the marriage was good.
She is heartbroken. I'm listening, coaxing her out for walks, cooking some nice food.
What are your best tips for helping overcome a broken heart?

OP posts:
Ostryga · 20/07/2023 18:38

Honestly just being there. You can’t really do a lot, she’s got to work through it all on her own. But just message her saying you’re thinking of her and if she needs anything to let you know. Don’t force anything, but check in and if she’s up to it spend time with her.

RandomOrder · 20/07/2023 20:19

I agree with PP that just being there for her will be a massive help. She might feel like you’re getting sick of hearing about it (if she’s anything like me!) so remind her that she can vent as much as she needs to. Her self-esteem will probably be quite dented from the experience so you could remind her of how awesome she is. Keeping busy is the best thing for heartbreak so you coaxing her out is great too.

I think it’s so lovely that you want to be here for her like this. My (ex)BF responded to my breakup by befriending my ex and then shit stirring between us. I would have loved to have someone take me under their wing like this when I needed it. You’re a good friend.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 20/07/2023 21:02

I have been there recently. Reassuring her she is lovable, just listening and let her cry and feel her feelings, never say 'at least...', when she is ready gentle reminders that there is so much happiness and more love out there, encouraging any healthy behaviors like healthy eating and sleep and exercises over drinking wine and binge eating.

Also, if you can, plan a holiday with her or even a weekend away, even if it's next year. One of the things I found so sad is not having a holiday with a partner to look forward to.

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