My partner and I have been together a year and living together since Feb. I do the majority of housework. My kids aged 9 &16 help when I ask them to and are expected to put away after themselves. As most parents know, kids don't always help and don't always put away after themselves. My partner finds this very frustrating and it ended in us having words. At first I said they're kids what do you expect?? (I wasn't justifying it but his moaning is getting on my wick). He said when he is on way home he "wonders what mess will await him" and that he cant live this way and that if it carries on he'll have to reconsider his options. So to get like this over a dirty plate left in the sink seems a bit over the top on one hand. For context in a previous relationship he had issues with his exe's children who apparently were not very nice to him and would break his things etc. My two are not like that in the slightest. My boys stepmum is not very nice to them, so I want to create a nice stable home for them...not with someone who I feel may resent them a bit already?! I'm starting to feel like I should run to the hills already.
This is the very first time we have had words, so for him to come out with those corkers has left me feeling like I am on borrowed time. I had been alone for 8 years previously and never thought I would love again...I'm beginning to remember why. I'm never good with confrontation, and it leaves me feeling hurt and upset for days after. Any words of wisdom??