Cannot get over my ex

[Notgood23]

I have a baby boy with my ex. He is 9 months old . At first I was sold the dream the house , a baby / marriage and I fell for it . I desperately tried to make a family with him but he didn’t want it as soon as I got pregnant. I’ve humiliated myself over and over by trying . He sees my son twice a week.

I feel sick and depressed every day . I check my phone to see if he has texted .
He says he cares about me but does not love me anymore/ can’t be with me .

I just cannot shake this . I keep wondering what I did wrong , why he doesn’t love me any more .

I need to move on and get past this. He has no interest in me / we don’t talk and we will only ever see each other in passing or if relevant to my son .

I am at total crisis point. I know this sounds pathetic . I feel disgusted with myself that he doesn’t want me . I always wonder if he misses me , when he does not .

Can anyone provide any advice for me , I feel so pathetic.

You are not pathetic, OP. You were tricked by a future-faking shit of a man who has now dumped you. Having a baby changes any woman’s life, and unexpectedly having to cope alone is a huge upheaval.

I do understand why you still long for him now - you can’t switch love off like a light, and everything in you knows he should be looking after you and his baby. It’s especially hard as you still have to see him twice a week.

But one day you will see this man for what he is, and despise him.

Make sure he’s paying full child maintenance, and find out what support services are available. Your GP’s surgery should have some information. Are you in touch with friends and family? You need them around you. Focus on loving and enjoying your baby.

Mumsnet is an excellent source of advice, and I’m sure someone who knows more will be along soon.

Best of luck, OP.

It's still early days, but in time you will see him as a waste of time, thinking about it. you will become strong and independent, years down the line you will think back and be glad to leave him in the past. Just keep focusing on your future.