Fantasy and regret, is this normal?

[Brad201]

Good evening everyone.

So a bit of a strange one, ill explain as best I can. So I have a fantasy or something that really turns me on but I really do not want it to and I do not want to have this fantasy.
So the thought of my wife having sex with another man and having a threesome with me and another man really turns me on for some strange reason, but it really does like if I think of her doing this it instantly gets me excited if you get my drift.
Now normally that's totally fine and normal to get turned on by a fantasy of course but here's where it is strange. So it absolutely disgusts me that I seem to have this fantasy and I honestly do not want this fantasy/turn on I wish I could erase it from my memory and never have it as it totally goes against personally what Im about as a person and I know 1000% I could never ever allow it to happen and it would absolutely destroy me and probably my marriage if I ever did let's say give it a go if my wife was willing. It would destroy me as a person and everything we have.
I also know you can have fantasies that you do not want to act upon and that's normal but it's not even that. I literally can't stand to have this fantasy and it disgusts me that it turns me on I really wish It did not turn me on and I could erase it from my memory forever but unfortunately, it really does turn me on.

What on earth is going on here I really can't explain it but its weird.

Give yourself a break! They’re just dirty thiughs 🤷‍♀️. The fantasy also turns my husband on (and probably countless men) but he has also said it is purely fantasy and he would never be comfortable with anything remotely like that happening for real. We are quite open about fantasies with one another though. Is it something you could share with your wife?

That sound be thoughts…

Definitely give yourself a break.
Your fantasies shouldn’t disgust you unless they involve hurting someone. Yours is completely harmless and fun. Of course you would never act on it and neither would your wife. That’s not even a question. Try to let go of the disgust. Acknowledge its presence (the disgust feeling) but also acknowledge it has no real place in your life and shrug it off. If you see the disgust from the outside it will have less power. I don’t know if I’m explaining that very well!

So I am not the only one lol? No, I totally understand what you are saying and I know it is normal to have dirty thoughts and fantasies that you would never do but this literally makes me feel disgusted, weird and like I hate to have it and do not want it if you get me. Like I am very uncomfortable having these thoughts but no matter how hard I try it just really turns me on.
I have joked about it to my wife as I wouldn't dare tell her that It actually turns me on as I do not want it to and im embarrassed myself, my wife is amazing and I know she wouldn't mind at all, we have a very sexual relationship and she has some crazy fantasies herself non involving others though and I know shes against this but I know if I really wanted her to try this she would just for me as shes like that.
My main issue isn't me been scared to tell my wife as I know 100% she'd accept it Its more the fact I hate it and do not want to have this fantasy.

Do you know, this thread has really got me going. I love a bit of Fantasy. Its one of Earth, Wind & Fire's best hits. In fact one of the best of the 1970's.

I'm going to bop around the kitchen watering the plants and getting stuff ready for tomorrow.

No, you explained it very well, wise words.