Guy was going to ask me out but my brother has put a stop to it

[Blue1939]

Hi guys just after advice on what other people think.
My brother works with another guy who i met a couple of months ago at a charity function, recently my brother told me that this guy has been asking questions about me, am i single etc and told my brother he wants to ask me out on a date, my brother told me that he told him at the time that there was someone else on the scene which isnt true, i said to my brother why would you say that and that i wouldnt mind going out with him, he is divorced with 2 kids, there was another charity event during the day which i said i would go to during the day, my brother said that this guy was going and was going to ask me out anyway i went to the event but by the time it was closing this guy was running late, i left with the event closing but my brother stayed behind to help clear up, the other guy turned up later on, the next day i asked my brother what was going on with this guy as he was going to ask me out and all of a sudden my brother denied we had any conversations about this guy i could tell he was lying to me, all the chats i had with my brother he said this guy was really keen on me, asking what time i would be at the event ,my brothers last words on this was you go out with a divorced man i dont think so, my brother can be over protective but i am not having him trying to control my life, i am tempted to text this guy and basically just say do you want to go out but i keep holding back thinking has this guy changed his mind or my brother has scared him off, my gut feeling is my brother has said something as he is only thinking of himself if it doesnt work out and he sees him at work.

Maybe your brother is being over protective for a reason? He must know this guy reasonably well if they work together. It not working out wouldn’t be a reason to put the guy off, but the guy being bad news is a good reason to put you off.

There’s a few things.

I absolutely wouldn’t want a work friend of mine going out with my brother. I would be bothered that it could cause me all sorts of issues at work.

But also, you can often know more about your work colleagues than someone meeting them casually. just ask your brother outright what the issue is?

Hard for us to know really.

Your brother could have good instincts and this man would be a bad idea (although the best thing to do would be to tell you of this so you can make your own choices). Maybe he thinks this man is just looking for someone to help with his kids and you are too young for that, again not his choice to make.

Or he just might not want to get stuck in the middle of a situation with a work colleague and his sister.

Or your brother could be massively overstepping the mark and be worrying about what this might look like from the outside. Are there cultural issues at play here?

Do you even like this guy?

Would you really want to date a man who has told your brother he wants to ask you out instead of actually just talking to you. That and the fact that he works with your brother and has 2 kids would put me off. There’s plenty of men, pick a different one. I can understand hour brother not wanting you to date him.

Your brother doesn't like the man or he doesn't like you - or maybe both. He knows both of you well, I presume, and doesn't see anything good coming from it.

Or, 3rd possibility, you and the man get together and the man tells you stuff about your brother your brother doesn't want you to know.