Cheating question

[Questionsquestions23]

Is it better to find out your partner cheated in a big way and admitted it rather than admitting they cheated in a smaller way which leaves you with doubt they are telling the truth? It has left me in a state of unease that I’m doing the right thing. I’d be able to handle a bigger infidelity better that the smaller one they’ve admitted to as at least I’d trust I knew everything.

No I don’t think it can ever be big enough to feel you know the truth. What I’ve found out I’d say is big but still feels like I’ll never know everything and that it must be even bigger than what I know.

This is dead in the water whichever way OP

maybe not now

but at some point

The moment they decided to go behind your back, you cannot trust a single word that comes out of their mouth. Think of it as a droning noise rather than words.
They cheated. Nothing they say will ever be believable from the moment they decide to commit this atrocity on your life.

Cheating in a small way… one-off blow job when drunk on night out?
cheating in a bigger way… full blown affair for some months, with much lying?

not sure it makes a difference- cheating is cheating

sorry if you are trying to get over this blip in your relationship OP

My ex-husband admitted to a small indiscretion (kissing). Someone he worked with. I did some digging and realised that the small indiscretion was impossible, but found a larger indiscretion (he slept with someone else) actually happened. He was was using the fake ‘small’ indiscretion to hide the bigger one.

You’ll never know the whole truth no matter what was ‘admitted’ to.

Best to make your decision on what you know now and not find out anymore.