Should i divorce

[Maxi54]

I’ve been married for over 30 years my DH has changed over the years I just don’t like him anymore although he is a good father and provider. So today is my birthday we go out for a meal with our adult sons, when they leave he says my hair looks crap, he doesn’t like my dress and I look old. Nice birthday! What a nasty thing to say to yr wife who you supposedly love. I want to divorce but am scared of being alone. What would you advise?

Alone and lonely are two different things.

Being alone means you so t have to listen to his nastiness and you can make your own happiness. Hobbies, new people, the world is your oyster.

Why grow old and shrivelled up inside with a man who you don't like and doesn't appear to like you very much?

Well, being alone can be pretty shit at times but I think it's much worse to feel alone within a relationship. Being spoken to like this damages your dignity, self respect and self esteem so much too. What specifically are you scared of?

Happy birthday

think how much better your birthday could be this time next year 💐

you will amaze yourself when you realise you can be happy and content by yourself. You can make new friends, try new hobbies and activities and travel. Get some legal advice and then find a counsellor if you are open to exploring your motivations and hang ups.

good luck you deserve so much more

Has he said things like that to you before OP? Not that it matters really, once is enough for that level of nastiness. I would be more afraid of remaining in a relationship with someone capable of speaking to me like that than being alone tbh, at least you won't have to listen to it if you leave him.

Two separate issues here - your husband's comments are deeply unpleasant and hurtful. God knows we've all been out not looking our best but my ex would just raise an eyebrow and say you might want to go to the bathroom and look in the mirror.

Cheap sniping is pathetic

The alone / lonely thing I've been through and concluded it's what you make of it. I struggled with it a bit at first but having a decent circle of friends and being proactive about doing stuff soon took that away.

From the bit you've put above your hubby sounds like a prick and you will probably be better off charting your own course

Hi @Maxi54 that's really nasty comments your husband made to you and on your birthday, that's really bad. Give it time, one day you'll just decide to divorce or stay and will have no regrets, at this present moment i think you're still in two minds.
Happy Birthday and sorry your husband ruined your evening 💐 xx