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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Insecure AF

4 replies

ghosties · 03/07/2023 22:43

I've been seeing my bf a year. We're going great, all heading in the right direction. I am SO insecure when he goes out drinking without me. He's going to a wedding at the weekend and I've been beside myself about it thinking all these lovely women will be there, looking amazing, dancing etc and he'll get his head turned and that'll be me out the window. This is all in my head, as he's never given me any indication he's anything other than smitten with me. I'm dreading the day because I know I'll be shitting myself. I was never like this with exH, despite him being an abusive dick, he actually made me feel like the only woman in the world, so that was potentially his one good point. Don't know why I'm being like this??

OP posts:
Tailfeather · 03/07/2023 22:46

If you are not usually insecure why do you think you are in this relationship? How does he make you feel you can't trust him?

ghosties · 03/07/2023 22:50

That's the odd thing, he's given me no indication he'd cheat or anything. I actually don't believe with my rational head he would. I think it's more me having dreadfully low self esteem at the moment. I don't know why as I don't feel bad about how I look, I have a good job etc. I feel shit about myself for no good reason. He clearly fancies me and wants me around, it doesn't make any sense 🙈

OP posts:
thecatinthetwat · 03/07/2023 22:55

ghosties · 03/07/2023 22:50

That's the odd thing, he's given me no indication he'd cheat or anything. I actually don't believe with my rational head he would. I think it's more me having dreadfully low self esteem at the moment. I don't know why as I don't feel bad about how I look, I have a good job etc. I feel shit about myself for no good reason. He clearly fancies me and wants me around, it doesn't make any sense 🙈

op, read this every time you’re having a wobble. This is the rational part of you, use this to ward off the irrational part. Also, make some nice plans for yourself that day, with other ppl if poss. Distract yourself and have a treat if you can afford to.

Yellowcakestand · 03/07/2023 22:59

I recently felt like this and my built up anxiety about things pushed my partner away. Please don't go down the same road as me xx

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