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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Negative comments about women

32 replies

comehomecathy · 03/07/2023 13:31

I would like to know how others would manage this situation.

My MiL is becoming extremely critical and borderline bitchy about other women. That includes celebrities. As an example, I mentioned one celebrity in passing and she interrupted me, sounded crazied, saying how this woman was ridiculous, trying to look like a teenager again when this woman is in her fifties, saying about her pathetic lip fillers.
These outbursts just appear so suddenly out of the blue in the middle of a normal conversation.
It's getting to me. I've taken the approach of diverting the conversation or making a more positive reply e.g. when she moans about a particular celebrity woman being fat, I reply that this woman is always so happy and cheerful.
She's doing it more often now, it's so negative and it's making me shut down. In my own house! I need a different approach.

OP posts:

frozendaisy · 04/07/2023 08:35

Artycrafts · 04/07/2023 05:28

So what label would you attach if negative comments were being made about male celebs? I doubt you would even bother.

Show quote history

Misandry, and people do they hate prince Harry, Daniel Craig, any of the supposed leftie, progressive men who aren't knuckle draggers.

frozendaisy · 04/07/2023 08:37

Surely OP you get your H to shut her down. If she's not impressing men she is more likely to stop.

OrkneyBird · 04/07/2023 08:41

MIL was obsessed with commenting about people's weight and it turned out later that she has a difficult relationship with her body, she's very insecure about her weight and so it was the first thing she noticed about others. Your MIL might be insecure about aging. Amanda looks great, better than me and I'm 35. If I had the money and on the spotlight like her of course I would do more to my appearance.

Crikeyalmighty · 04/07/2023 08:51

I think these women are more than aware they are often losing their looks and suddenly feeling old and unsexy- add in a few niggling health issues , annoying partners , the menopause and it's a very toxic mix - I am 61 and I really try not to feel like this but it does occasionally creep in and I'm as far from the Daily mail as you can get!!

rumred · 04/07/2023 09:31

Second what @Arealnumber says. Hags clarifies what's going on. It's misogyny plus ageism. Sad but true

pheonixrebirth · 04/07/2023 13:14

When I was a teenager, If I said anything negative about a celebrity or real life person, my Mum would say "that's a shame, they think very highly of you"! It definitely made me think more about my attitude.

Xeren · 04/07/2023 14:26

Yes! My MIL is the same!

And as @Yupiknowhowthatfeels said, she and FIL are on a daily diet of Daily Mail, Talk TV, GB News.

She was popping off about Carol Vorderman in a bikini. I just looked at her dead in the eyes and said “She looks amazing. I would wear a bikini too if I looked like that!”.

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