At a total loss, is it over?

[Mrswhite777]

Going to try not drip feed but here we go..

Married to DH, 3 children previously, one together and expecting.

Both work together in shared business.

Things have been rough since we had DS (2), we argued a lot after birth, my PND, which i accept i contributed to the arguments.

I hate sex with him, hate being touched by him and repulsed by the thought of any affection. He always comments how he wants it and constantly grabbing me.

He is just awful to be around, and he always checks my phone and doesn't trust me so i have to always have a proven letter for am appointment.

Help me!

He sounds, quite frankly, horrid and abusive

You can help yourself by leaving him. Put a password on your phone and see a solicitor as soon as humanly possible. Call Women's Aid and ask for help. Do whatever you can to get away as quickly as you can. Only you can get yourself out of this nightmare.

I’m not sure why you are bringing another child into this toxic situation?

It wasn't planned, clearly. Precautions were taken, which clearly failed

He often snapping and in a bad mood when i say no.

This morning, it's all apparently my fault as I'm not thinking about his needs.

I have also started to notice him trying to wind the older children up, so they mardy (expected!) so he can snap at me how they don't respect him.

2 weeks ago there was s a full on argument between him and child 11, she walked out. He gave me a choice if i go after her he's reporting me for putting unborn in risk. He keeps saying for me to make a choice between him and 2yr old DS and my older children who he wants to send to dads and If i choose the kids he will report me saying I'm incompetent as a mother. Which is 100 % not the case. Obviously i will always choose the kids over a man child.

I want to leave but i just dont knlw6 how to start as everything is joint except the house which is mine.

See a solicitor as soon as you can re starting divorce proceedings. I would also urge you to contact Womens Aid.

You say you will always choose the dcs over him ? Then do it , it very much sounds like their life is not enriched by him being there .

I echo @AttilaTheMeerkat Please speak to Women's Aid asap for advice and support. He is clearly abusive and you need to get him out of your life and your children's lives as soon as you can.

He's a sociopath. And five (!) kids are going to be fucked up by this toxic situation if you don't do something ASAP. The older ones are already.