How do you co parent with someone that won't communicate?

[Rega26]

Long story but I will try and keep it to the point. H and I separated in Jan 22 (his choice) but it took a year before he moved out. There was no big fall out, we simply grew apart. He promised he would stay in all our lives and remain civil and up until recently, it has been.
A few weeks ago, he took exception with the fact I let my daughters friend cut our sons hair (he's not a barber but is great at cutting hair) my son was happy with it and it looked good but just a slightly different style to normal.
He was so cross with my son (8 Yr old) that DS said he disnt want to visit him that weekend.
I told him this and he had a rant about how he wouldn't bother anymore and if slang of the kids wanted to see him, they should let him know.
The next day he didn't show up at the normal time to take DS to football training so I dropped him off. He turned up as I was getting home and drove off in a rage that I had already done it. That weekend he refused to take DS to to any more football (depite the fact he was coaching so was going himself) and hasn't spoken to me since! He won't respond to any messages I send him about arrangements for our 4 kids and only communicates through them.
DS has gone this weekend but has been messaging me saying that his dad keeps asking why he doesn't live him or miss him yet is currently lying in bed napping while DS is on his ipad 😒
How can I ccontinue to try and share parenting with this man when he is adamant he won't have anything to do with me? I'm most worried about how all this will affect the kids - particularly my DS who at only 8 is really confused. Any advice please? 🙏

I'm pretty sure there is a website you can jointly use to communicate parenting issues that doesn't involve talking to each other. Someone with more knowledge than me will hopefully come along.
Unfortunately you can't force him to communicate with you. You will have to just get on with things your end and ignore him while he gets over his big fat sulk.
It is extremely tedious though.

Accept it. My ex is very difficult and any time you disagree with her or dont do exactly as she asks, she cites shes "the primary carer", will refuse to respond/stonewalls and shuts down all comms.

The best way of handling it is treating them a bit like a child having a tantrum, acknowledge their feelings, stay calm yourself, and just lay out your position and ALWAYS give 2 choices or more. It's more about you telling them to do something than the actual issue.

Learn SET communication.

@Gettingbysomehow exactly that - tedious!!

Apologies for all the typos, I think it was the irritation getting to me! 😒

@Vretz thanks, that's really helpful.