Possible PND in DH? The logistics of leaving?

[NC9012]

NC. Still, very nervous about posting on this board.

My DH seems to have some PND after the birth of DC2 a few months ago. He has agreed to a GP appointment to speak to them in a few weeks. He wants me to go with him.

It's just he has completely changed. He has been angry and irritable. He's snappy, has a short fuse and is generally horrible to be around a lot of the time, especially for our slightly older DC1. So much so I am seriously considering leaving for the sake of our children. I have spoken to some of my family about that fact and they are a good support to me.

I feel yesterday something kind of switched off and I am done after he had another 'outburst' and was angry while around our DC. He is always sorry after and seems to think that it solves everything the next day but I am seriously worried about the effect on our children especially on our older DC. He was never ever like this before DC2.

Basically, where do I start? Any advice? Am I doing the right thing? Everyone thinks he is great and we are great and that we have the perfect family. And I am feeling very anxious about the prospect of logistics and things.

I should add so not to drip feed, I am under a mental health team although have always been the primary carer for our DC but that's another one of my worries because I am concerned that is going to go against me or he will say I am 'mad'. There has never been any concern about my parenting though.

Thanks.

I'm really sorry you're in his situation. It's certainly not easy. Can I ask why your partner can't see a GP sooner than a few weeks? It seems an awful long time to wait. He can speak to a GP over the phone, and they can assess him that way.

In terms of logistics, lean on your family as much as you can. When you say they're supportive, what does that look like? Would it be you moving out to live with them? Them helping with childcare/school runs, etc? Any help they can offer, take it.

Only you know if leaving is the right thing to do, and if you're worried about him saying you're 'mad', speak to your mental health support worker/team and explain your situation and relay your fears about what he would say about your parenting. Involving them and making them aware of these issues would probably be a good move (I would think).