New relationship and shared my personal life with mutual friend

[Yuppypup]

hi, I’ve been dating a lovely lady for around 2 months. We are both women if it makes any difference.
my ex treated me very badly, lied, cheated and really betrayed me. We share a daughter.
I told my new partner about my relationship with my ex and how they treated me. Also
told her I don’t tell everyone this information.
she told she met a person in work today and it turned out this person also knows my ex through work. New girlfriend said they got chatting about my ex and she basically told her all the details of how I was treated.
im very annoyed at this as this is so personal to me and I still have to co parent with my ex so I try to keep things amicable for our daughter.
my new girlfriend doesn’t see the big deal, fees I’m overreacting.
what are your thoughts?

Its not up to her to tell you that you are overreacting.
Your feelings are valid.
If it were me, I'd feel very upset.

2 months in and she is betraying you already......

Her reasoning was that this mutual friend thought a lot of my ex and she wanted to put them right

"Very annoyed" would be putting it mildly. This "lovely lady" is not lovely at all. She's a fucking blabbermouth with absolutely no sense of discretion or loyalty. You've barely begun dating and she has betrayed you horribly.

This should be the only red flag you need to end it. The expression, "Fool me once..." comes to mind.

Forewarned is fair warned, op.

No reason on earth justifies how badly she's betrayed your confidence.

Ugh, she didn’t even consider that you still had to co-parent with this ex and what you said could very easily get back to her?

This would be a dumpable offence in my eyes. I would t want to be in a relationship with someone so obtuse.

Thank you, I feel the same

That is a shocking betrayal of your confidence Op - I'd finish with her as she can't be trusted.

My advice is dont overshare in new relationships.Its good to let things develop in the here and now,then if time goes on you will get a sense of their trustworthiness.
It's difficult because honest people want to be open but it's not a bad thing to guage who deserves your trust and it takes time and shared experiences before you can get a good feel for a person.
Protect your heart,value yourself,love yourself.You deserve loyalty,be discerning.

What @Aquamarine1029 said. End it now, she has shown that she’s untrustworthy.

Well how are you meant to trust her if she can't even keep her mouth shut when you've asked her to?

She might have just said it because she wanted the person to know how it really was but it wasn't her place to say anything. People will believe what they want to and there doesn't need to be people in the middle gossiping about it.

I'd probably bin it off as it's still early days.

Jeez , if you can’t talk to your partner in confidence who can you talk to.
Sounds like she was happy to dish the dirt on your bad experience. Honestly that is really bad form, she should know better. You’re not over reacting at all.

Yeah really poor form I agree and the fact she doesn’t recognise the issue as well

She's nothing but a low life gossip. Time to cut loose. And be careful what you share in future - 2 months is no time to know someone, as you've found to your cost.

Your partner was completely out of order. And the fact that she now can't see what she's done wrong and has told you you're overreacting is a whole series of red flags.

Time to let this one go. It feels as if you committed too soon - calling her a partner after only 2 months? - but you don't deserve to have your trust betrayed like this.

I know mumsnet always like to say how people are using partner ‘too soon’ indicating the OP may be too serious but this is such a pet peeve of mine. I’m a gay woman, that’s the term I use.

Throw this one back OP, you can do better