Should I have been patient?

[Wishuponastar94]

So I’m on my period, it’s my first after me and my partner decided to go through with an abortion. We have a 11 month old and I just been feeling super cranky and annoyed as hell as well as overstimulated, it was 5pm I hadn’t ate anything all day and my partner kept touching me (non sexually) or kissing me and I told him a few times like not to or I just went along with it but he could see I don’t want to be touched and in one moment when he knew I didn’t want to he kept asking for kisses and I just said to him please I just want some space and he said ok and went silent and spent most his time in the bathroom. Normally I like the attention but I was just feeling meh yesterday and then I felt bad and hugged him apologised twice and just explained I feel meh and he never spoke and I said you mad at me he said no I’m just giving you space after a bit I told him I don’t want any space now I’m sorry and for the rest of the evening/night he never really spoke to me at all just to our little one and never hugged touched or kissed me literally nothing. Am I wrong to feel shitty about it?

You did nothing wrong. Your partner is not a nice person.

Yep, he’s not nice. I hope he treats you better at other times.

What you did is fine.

Playing along and keep letting him carry on when you weren't wanting to wouldn't have been.

Hopefully he wakes up in a better mood today. But you did nothing wrong!

I'd like you to think about why you think you might be unreasonable in not prioritising his desire to touch you over your desire not to be touched.

You have every right to bodily integrity, regardless of who is wanting to touch you. Every right to ask someone not to. And every right not to be ignored or have someone obviously get the hump when you ask not to be touched.

Honestly, he doesn't sound respectful or considerate.

Is this a one-off or a pattern? Does he often express his displeasure at you making your own choices over your own body?

So he's punishing you with the silent treatment.
Tell him, you are not accepting this, you felt touched out/hungry/sad, whatever. His reaction should be, "OK my love, can I get tea/cook/ go & have a rest/bath...Wanker
Stop this NOW

Well he sounds a treat.

You have every right to not be touched, even if it's by your partner. My husband is very tactile and I sometimes have to ask him to not touch me for a while as I'm touched out. I'm sure it does sting a little, but do you know what he's never done? Sulk like a child and give me the silent treatment. He's respected my wishes because respects me.

His desire to touch you does not trump your desire to not be touched. You're not a thing. Stop apologising to him and trying to placate him, it's why he's doing this. Let him have his little hissy fit, completely ignore him.

I had to just wake him up since we have our little ones cake smash shoot I stroked his head kissed him twice and said baby wake up and woke him up with our toddler. He did our toddlers name and told him his waking up but never acknowledged me at all

Oh stop indulging him. You just had an abortion which is so hard mentally to go through. He's an absolute arse without empathy or kindness. Just ignore him.

DO NOT ACCEPT THIS.
There is NOTHING less attractive than a sulking man child.
" if Im not allowed to ask you (over & over) to stop mauling me, when Im tired without you sulking," then Im leaving.

Kind if makes you think if you dont want sex, isn't that rape?

Eurgh I can't stand a sulker!

I really don’t understand what I did wrong. I’ve had communication issues due to past trauma and every time we argue at the end of it he will tell me this is a safe space etc and I can communicate instead of getting in a huff and bottling it up but I’ve noticed when I do try share stuff or now that I told him I needed space it seems it doesn’t go down well. I just feel like I need to shut off trying to communicate and stuff

You did nothing wrong, he's being a big sulky man baby and you're probably better off without him. Silent treatment is extremely cruel and abusive, a man who can do this doesn't love you

I’ve gone through the whole day today and his said like 5 things to me the whole day briefly. No convo no hug no I love you no nothing. Now his gone to sleep. We went to our little ones cake smash and he stayed quiet the whole time maybe spoke to me once about something and that was it. I just asked for a bit of space yesterday and then even apologised twice and today he still is off? I feel so upset and so hurt