Have I lost my spark?

[Yourothermother]

I feel very disconnected from my partner just recently my labido has greatly diminished over the years as he's got a very low sex drive only have sex when he can be bothered the last time we did do it I felt absolutely no emotion towards it he wasnt turning me on or even making an effort too. I feel very lonely in my relationship he doesn't come to bed(only does when he wants sex) doesn't hug me has stopped kisses me and telling me he loves me I don't get complimented I just get told to stop sulking, I'm not sulking im exhusted and upset that we've potential lost our spark. Help me with good constructive advise to get me out of this rut please!

I don't know if your and husband's libido loss is due to a medical reason or lack of attraction or normal age changes but what you describe is more than just losing spark. I think the starting point is thinking of what you want and then having a conversation with him in an honest way, if you both want to stay in the relationship you'll need some assistance be it medical or counselling or both.

Nope no medical issues with either of us. I dont think it's a age thing we are both early/middle 30s he doesn't seem to be interested in forplay or anything like that just comes upstairs extremely horny, me not so, we do the deed (even though I'm dry as the desert due to no forplay) then he rolls over and falls asleep it wouldn't surprise me if he's masterbating inbetween intimacy with me. I want it to work I see me getting very old and grey with him but at the moment it feels like im living with a lodger

Omg
Do not have sex if you.don't want to. He is a selfish git. It should be about mutual.pleasure. Don't let him.use you.

Oh I very much do want to have sex with him there's no issue there, I want it more than he does he just doesn't do any foreplay to get me going