I've recently separated from my husband. I am quite sure he is narcissistic after studying his behaviour properly and now he is at the final discard.
I've also had Lundy Bancrofts book why does he do that which led to me realising he was more abusive than I thought - I'd say 80% of our interactions were abusive. After a failed promise to enrol on an intervention programme, he got to the stage where he insisted we both needed to change which I know Is common for abusers to get to this stage and leave.
Questions, how easy is it to get a non molestation order? He continues to text abusive stuff. I've had to block him but he then says loudly in front of the children that we must all be in contact due to an emergency. So I unblock but this opens up avenues for him to spout his abuse.
The house mortgage is in his name only - in the beginning of our relationship he was out of work and I got into so much debt supporting us. My dad lent us a substantial deposit and gifted it to my husband for us on the promise we'd give it back when he retired which we were fine with. Unfortunately my dad was killed in 2020 and this never happened. He says he will sell the house and has no intention of keeping the money but obviously this is a worry.
Finally, he refuses to ever admit his abusive ways were the cause of how our relationship ended and I know he will go onto abuse other women. I know I can't stop this but I feel guilt. I also feel stupid that I ever trusted this man and the promises to change. I don't consider myself a stupid woman but I'm loving and kind and I feel like I've attached myself to a monster. His emotional and psychological abuse actually worsened after my dad died. Every year of the death of uis anniversary he makes it hell.
I'm so glad to be Rid but how do I heal myself?