Enough is Enough

[ItzOver]

In practical terms, what's the best way to end a marriage with young children involved? What steps should be taken?

Situation is -

H works F/T
I'm a SAHP
House is owned (mortgage)
DC too young to explain things to.

Get a solicitor

and if both reasonable and fairly amicable…. Mediation is good. Saved us a fortune and my ex and I co parent very well. Infact I’m meeting him for a coffee later!

Thanks @Successstory82 do you know roughly how much we'll be looking at for a solicitor? Even ballpark?

Get a job would be my main priority.

Be financially self sufficient.

Depends entirely on the complexity of the divorce and how much you use them

So no one can give you a ballpark I’m afraid

You haven’t divorced have you?

It's not that easy, I have 2 children and neither are at the age where they are eligible for free childcare yet.

I totally understand. Thanks.

Ignore that poster. Clearly no experience

Have you checked entitled to to see what money you will get each month? This has to be your first step.
Has he left or is he aware you are leaving - it can get nasty over money even if amicable at present.

You can factor in maintenance but often seemingly reasonable husbands stop paying if they can - or mess you around over it.

If you work universal credit will help with childcare - depending on salary.

You won’t get a mortgage without at least some earned income. Do you have somewhere to go?

Depending on why you are splitting marriage counselling to see if you can resolve/split amicably may be worth it (not suitable if domestic abuse is an issue).

Apologies, I didn't mean to sound abrupt.
We don't have any free childcare where I am.
If you were to get a job now and then break up your husband would have to financially support the childcare surely? It's not all down to you.

Thanks @Flowerycat I have checked the benefits calculator. I don't currently work due to the ages of my children. I do have somewhere we could go but would be loathed to remove them from their home, although I appreciate it's likely that this will be the only option. We are past the point of counselling, I've suggested it more than once and he never takes me up on it. He is also incapable of communicating maturely which is one of the biggest reasons for my decision to split.

It would cost over £2000 a month for childcare for both DC and we couldn't afford that as well as the cost of running two seperate households.