Feel so stressed with everyone

[Susa1]

I have two kids from previous relationship I was single for a few years before meeting my current partner 4 years down the line we have a child together now but my 16 year old son hates my partner and he isn’t much fond of him either it’s just getting worse and it’s horrible environment to live in .
I work ft and my partner works from home and all day ip get messages about my sons doing this and that then my son will message about my partner I can’t take it anymore i can’t relax that arguments are going to start I can’t even focus in work as my phone is constantly going . My son isn’t at school has no interest in college a job etc and leaves a mess everywhere comes in at midnight this is why my partner is moaning and my son is moaning cause he’s not allowed his friends in durning the day cause my partner is on work calls all day we have a small house not much room for privacy. If I pull my son up about leaving his things everywhere like after a bath he will not drain it and leave the dirty clothes in the floor he goes off on one at me .
Has anyone went through this ? I’ve 3 kids and trying to work ft supporting them but I feel like running away .

[Pinkbonbon]

Hate to say it but you really need to start laying down the law with your boy. Your partner probably feels you've made it a him against him situation as he's the only one standing up to your sons awful behaviour.

Your 16 year old boy goes of on one at you? Nah, fuck that. 'Who do you think you're talking to! This is my house. Sort your shitty attitude out or go stay with your dad'.

I was prepared to have sympathy for him when you said your partner is home all day. But then you described what's been going on. I'm surprised your partner tolerates it.

You need to tell your son that he's to get back at reasonable hours and clean up after himself.
And make it clear its coming from you. Not your partner. I'd actually take him out for food or something and have a proper convo with him about responsibility and what you expect of him.
(A job, cleaning up after himself, home at reasonable hours).

You gotta get on top of this ASAP or you'll have an abusive man in your house. It'll scare your partner away. And your son will go on to think he can throw his weight around with women and get his way.

Rules and boundaries time.
And stick to them.

[Itsanotherhreatday]

Wow. I have three teens and DH works from home some weeks - it’s awful for them - can make breakfast as it creates noise, can’t have friends round, can’t play music , can phone friends as it’s loud.

Yes they make a mess and we all sort it later - no big deal - he’s trapped in there with your partner in his own home.

Bet he can’t wait to leave.

[Susa1]

It’s horrible to live like this I honestly wish I never met my partner .

[Charliescat]

I don’t blame your son my mum decided to inflict her partner on us when I was 15 and even though I was the most boring teenager in existence I felt uncomfortable in my own home with him . People should prioritise their children in these scenarios I think blood is thicker than water .

[Zarataralara]

What is your son going to do if he’s not in school, college or training or a job?
I can see how they’ll get on each others nerves if one is trying to work and the other is making a mess, albeit in his own home.
Can you tell your son he needs to be in an apprenticeship, or training or a job, or the Army maybe? It’s not fair it all comes back on you, and he could behave exactly the same with his natural father.

[Pinkbonbon]

@Susa1

It’s horrible to live like this I honestly wish I never met my partner .

Well if tou feel that way, whats stopping you from leaving him?

Perfectly fine to be single ýou know.