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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I think DH is suffering from depression

2 replies

CousinHelena3749 · 29/05/2023 22:39

And has been for the whole of our marriage on and off. When he’s good he’s great, but when he’s in a low patch it’s awful. Absolutely miserable, sees everything in worst way, is grumpy, short tempered, I am walking on egg shells and I find myself trying to constantly cheer him up/keep him happy which I know isn’t great.
I am worried our children will pick up on it. I’ve suggested counselling/antidepressants but he gets angry if I suggest them and says I am making him more depressed. He’s currently in a low patch and he has said twice this week that he ‘may as well kill himself’.
I am so fed up, exhausted. I want him to get better. He has cried every day for the last week.
i don’t know what to do.
If I am totally totally honest, part of me is wondering if maybe one day I want to leave. But does that make me an awful person? I wonder if I would be happier on my own with my children. I love him, but I am getting so fed up with this.

OP posts:
Bluebells1970 · 29/05/2023 22:48

No one can help having MH issues. But they can't expect support/sympathy when they refuse to engage with help/getting better.

Don't expose your DC to this, they'll grow up thinking it's OK and it's normal. And it's neither. You aren't responsible for his happiness... only your own. It's perfectly ok to say you can't do this anymore Flowers

Wolfiefan · 29/05/2023 22:50

He’s not being fair to you or the kids. Either he seeks help and engages with medical professionals or you leave.
Or is he saying this stuff just to manipulate you and get what he wants??

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