Separated and moving on

[Bigned3986]

Hi there, recently separated from my wife after 21 years, but still friends, thankfully but...
Before we separated, I discovered she was on dating apps and chatting to numerous men. She has since met at least two or three and has slept with one since. This is less than three weeks since we split. She claims she is okay, but I have my niggles. Don't get me wrong, in some respects I am relieved about the split as the last couple of years have been very tense. But I'm concerned she is attention seeking. Maybe it's none of my business and I'm kind of glad she can be honest with me. Really, what do you guys think. Before she slept with that guy, I may have had her back if she wanted, but now, there's no chance for me. I need to move on too. As I say, we will always be friends, especially as we co parent.

Secondly, do we just stay 'separated' or go for divorce? She said she would never marry again, and to be fair, it's far too soon for me to think about that. It's just something on the back of my mind before I seek professional advice. Thank you all.

You were not together so why would she not? And why is a woman who has sexual needs attention seeking?

Sounds like she is telling you this? Why? Is she trying to make you jealous so you go back?

This is what my ex did, he later said that he needed to 'prove he was still attractive' but it all ended badly and he got burnt. I don't think your wife is attention seeking she's just having what she will see as a good time. There's not a lot you can do. I would say divorce, if you are not going to get back together just get on with a divorce, it makes sense.

Many thanks all. She isn't telling me thinking I'll want her back. In fact, in some ways I'm glad she is telling me, rather than try and hide it. She admitted the whole thing is painful, but it was good that we both talked and told each other how we felt. As I said, we will always be friends, but have our own independent lives now. Interestingly enough, she told me she had a date, which didn't go well. So she walked away, which proves she won't settle for anything.

Re divorce, I'll seek professional advice and take it from there. I was more picking brains on here as this is all new territory for me

Bit more to this one. Poor daughter is telling me that mum has about ten conversations on the go, is always on her phone and less attentive to her needs. Alcohol consumption certainly has not dropped since separating. Daughter is desperate to have a bed in my flat when I get one so she can stay whenever she wants...
I know what I need to do.......