Giving a statement about my ex tomorrow

[Twirlsandswirls12]

I'm giving a statement to the police tomorrow regarding my ex and his harassing and intimidating messages he's sent me recently and in the past. He's also taking me to court as I reduced his contact time with our son. He goes from horrible abuse via texts to him going quiet for a while but now I'm so anxious because I know he will kick off again once the police visit him about this. Has anyone dealt with anything similar to this before?

Quick background: split 6 years ago when son was a baby. He was verbally, mentally and financially abusive. Ended up in woman's refuge. Over the years I've let him do what he wants eg. He wants an extra day etc. I've said yes to keep the peace. Contact was.stopped and then reduced to daytime contact only due to him not giving him his asthma inhalers and reflux medication which son needs daily. Currently awaiting court docs from his solicitor. I feel like I'm in a living hell atm

Any advice or calming words?

Well done for getting out. I’m a survivor of DV myself and know how utterly soul destroying it can be, two years later and I am still suffering from C-PTSD and trying to get my life back on track.

it takes courage and strength that people cannot fully appreciate. You are doing an amazing thing by reporting him to the police.

I’ve also done the Bar and have lots of experience of the family court. They are switched on when it comes to domestic abuse, so please do not be nervous. He has not acted in the best interests of your child and using court proceedings as a further method of abuse is a well understood tactic. The fact you are reporting him to the police will help. Are you represented? Feel free to DM me if you need to.

you’re being incredibly brave.

Well done for walking away from this relationship. As pp I was in an abusive relationship and sought help from the police. Getting a restraining order helped massively.

What did the restraining order entail? No text contact and physical contact? Did access go through 3rd party instead. Also if it was broken what would happen?

Mine stops him from contacting me , can't discuss me on social media, directly / indirectly, enter property where I am.
He doesn't see our child, hasn't for years, he's on the sex offenders register though.

Thank you for your words

Alot of people are telling me I'm brave and strong but I don't feel it. I feel anxious and scared.

With regards to court my biggest worry is they will believe his lies because I know that's what he will be doing.

Gather all your proof. Every text, every email, every message. That’s your proof.
I remember your previous post about your ex not giving ds his inhalers and meds. If you can write up a log of every time he’s done this.
I find writing everything down helps with calming, you can see just how much evidence you have.
Include every time you’ve agreed to your ex having extra access, every time you’ve changed times to suit him. This shows how reasonable you are.
Stay calm and state your son’s welfare Is your no 1 concern and ex does not keep your son safe health-wise.
Good luck. 💐

I know I get it. It’s just what you have to do. It doesn’t feel like bravery when you’re in it. It’s feels like necessity.

the courts are smart enough to know that women don’t just go to women’s refuge centres for the fun of it. As PP has said, have as much evidence as possible.

Thanks for your advise. The officer took my statement this morning. She was here for 2 hours. Didn't expect it to be that long. She wanted to know all the background and history. I've known ex for 9 years so there was alot!!
She said he will probably get arrested.
I feel like I've delayed this part for a long time. I'm scared though. I'm backing him into a corner. He could have less time with his son. What happens to a person when they loss everything I feel like they become dangerous.