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Original poster

Sick of it all the time

13 replies

yvonneb13 · 24/05/2023 06:54

Again my arsehole husband has flung it in my face this morning "it must be so hard not having a job" I do have a job but I'm currently on maternity leave we have a 3 month old son all because the washing wasn't done and there was a few dishes in the sink honestly see most of the time he's good but some days he just wakes up and things I'm gonna pick a fight also baring in mind he had a hard day at work yesterday so I told him to rest and I done the whole bed time bath time routine myself he's such a selfish arsehole at times also he's going to football tonight after work so I'll be alone again glad he's away to work now. Prick sorry just had to get it off my chest 7am in the morning and I'm already feeling like shit.

OP posts:
Original poster
yvonneb13 · 24/05/2023 08:09

Bump

OP posts:
GoodnightJude1 · 24/05/2023 08:19

I hear you OP. It’s shit. My ex didn’t seem to realise that being a mum IS a full time (and then some) job.
I found the only way to deal with his childish outbursts was to ignore him. I’d carry on with what I was doing and leave him to rant about working ‘24/7’ (he didn’t…he worked 8-4 Mon-Fri) and spent the rest of the time playing his stupid little computer games.
I think some men enjoy the feeling of superiority, coming home after their ‘hard days work’ and expecting dinner on the table, the baby in bed and all the ironing neatly put away. Some just don’t understand the constant pressure of being a new mum.
If he was so worried about the washing and the dishes in the sink, he’d have come in and sorted it.

Original poster
yvonneb13 · 24/05/2023 08:22

GoodnightJude1 · 24/05/2023 08:19

I hear you OP. It’s shit. My ex didn’t seem to realise that being a mum IS a full time (and then some) job.
I found the only way to deal with his childish outbursts was to ignore him. I’d carry on with what I was doing and leave him to rant about working ‘24/7’ (he didn’t…he worked 8-4 Mon-Fri) and spent the rest of the time playing his stupid little computer games.
I think some men enjoy the feeling of superiority, coming home after their ‘hard days work’ and expecting dinner on the table, the baby in bed and all the ironing neatly put away. Some just don’t understand the constant pressure of being a new mum.
If he was so worried about the washing and the dishes in the sink, he’d have come in and sorted it.

My point exactly I made him his lunch for work to I seriously think sometimes he thinks I'm superwoman there's only so much I can do especially with a demanding 3 month old

OP posts:
GracePalmer33 · 24/05/2023 08:27

What a prick. You need to have a proper talk with him when the baby is in bed about it, or it's going to keep happening, and it's the last thing you need when you're trying to enjoy these precious first few months with your baby.

Managing to do anything around the house while looking after a baby is hard. And he'd know if he ever looked after the baby and cared enough to try and do housework too.

I suggest you also plan a nice Saturday to yourself and go recharge and have fun while he looks after the little one. You need time to yourself too.

Saucemonkey · 24/05/2023 08:29

Take this Saturday to prove your point. Leave dh with baby and go out - all day for 8 hours. Then come home and ask if it was fun.

Maray1967 · 24/05/2023 08:30

So no more making his lunch then - stop it now. No one who speaks to you like that deserves favours.

Prioritise what baby and you need - the rest can wait. If there’s too much laundry, do baby’s and yours and leave his for him to do.

Original poster
yvonneb13 · 24/05/2023 09:02

Saucemonkey · 24/05/2023 08:29

Take this Saturday to prove your point. Leave dh with baby and go out - all day for 8 hours. Then come home and ask if it was fun.

Unfortunately he has football this Saturday to it's just bollocks

OP posts:
frozendaisy · 24/05/2023 09:03

Is it all the time,? Or is it most of the time he's "good"?

If most of the time he's "good" and he is generally a caring, loving partner and dad then you just need a quiet word that you are not going to put up with him taking out a "hard day at work" on you so he needs to stop this right now.

If it's "all of the time" that's a completely different issue. That is more he sees you as lesser because you are doing "woman's work" in the home and he is big boss mighty penis worker man. Then you need to decide if you can put up with his nonsense forever.

Spacestace · 24/05/2023 09:06

He sounds hideous. You're on maternity leave for a start, but even if you didn't have a job whilst he might get stressed about finances he still shouldn't talk to you like a piece of shit. I have been between jobs for various reasons in the past (so different anyway to your situation) and DH never berated me or made me feel like crap- even before we had children so I literally could have done nought all day.

Autumntimeagain · 24/05/2023 11:01

So what if he's got bloody football on Sat ? What free time have YOU got in the damn diary ???

If you're truly angry with him, you need to show it, not push it down so that there's not an 'atmosphere' and allowing HIM to carry on with his happy bloody social activities !

It's because women shove all their anger and frustration down, to keep everyone ELSE bloody happy, that they suffer 1000 times MORE than they actually need to !

Shout it from the fucking rooftops that he's being a selfish, angry and abusive twat ! And that you are NOT going to put up with it ! Ever !

You'll feel better for not holding all those negative feelings.

He may actually realise that you're NOT going to put up with being treated like shit ! And therefor better fucking well stop acting like a massive twat or risk losing all he has !

Good luck !

Original poster
yvonneb13 · 24/05/2023 11:04

Autumntimeagain · 24/05/2023 11:01

So what if he's got bloody football on Sat ? What free time have YOU got in the damn diary ???

If you're truly angry with him, you need to show it, not push it down so that there's not an 'atmosphere' and allowing HIM to carry on with his happy bloody social activities !

It's because women shove all their anger and frustration down, to keep everyone ELSE bloody happy, that they suffer 1000 times MORE than they actually need to !

Shout it from the fucking rooftops that he's being a selfish, angry and abusive twat ! And that you are NOT going to put up with it ! Ever !

You'll feel better for not holding all those negative feelings.

He may actually realise that you're NOT going to put up with being treated like shit ! And therefor better fucking well stop acting like a massive twat or risk losing all he has !

Good luck !

Thank you for that I needed to here that he sent me an apology text and I haven't replied I'm gonna lay it all out when he gets home because it's not on I have nothing planned but he goes to football once or twice a week.

OP posts:
TooOldForThisNonsense · 24/05/2023 11:05

Having a new baby is hard, I was so close to telling my husband to go fuck himself so many times when our eldest was a baby x

Cotonsugar · 24/05/2023 11:53

When I had to go into hospital unexpectedly for a week and my husband had to look after three kids, youngest age two, for the entire time by himself, he actually realised how much work was involved and made him appreciate me a lot more once I was home. Leave the baby with him for a whole weekend and he’ll soon change his tune.

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