Sitting in my car with nowhere to go

[Gwdihooooo]

Just that really.

Just had an argument with dh about my Family. He thinks I prioritise seeing them during school holidays over spending time with just him and kids.

It’s true that dh has seen them more than normal…. Twice in the past 2 months By the way!… My sis for a day during Easter, and my mum for an hour yesterday. But I’ve arranged a weekend with them in June (not even in the holidays)

Dh used to work away for a few weeks at a time, so during this time, if it fell during the hols I would arrange little holidays with my family. He would be away.

But he’s currently home on long term sick, so he feels that I see them too much, basically because he’s here! They annoy him. Which is fair enough… his family annoy me!

We’ll the argument ended up with him saying that I’d rather be with my family and I’m only with him for his money and to be ‘kept’… barring in mind we’ve been together 18yrs have 2 older kids and I’ve always worked full time. I don’t pay towards the mortgage though as he earns over double what I do.

Here I am sitting in the car, hurt that he thinks I’m a sponge. With nowhere to go because I’m in work tomorrow, live too far from family and don’t have any close friends.

It’s just shit!

Even if I wanted to leave! How could I?!

Sorry you’re going through this. Do you want to leave? Or is it worth working on? Sounds like he needs to either get back to work (when he can) or find some other way to busy himself. I see my parents a few times a month and MIL weekly. My family are like good friends as well so I would never not want to see them. Can you point out all the things you do pay for and you do / have done over the years to keep the house running that you don’t get paid for? Men seem to forget about how difficult it is to raise kids and organise the family as well as housework

Tell him you see him too much! I would be staying with family regularly if he was my dh. You aren't his staff...

@Gwdihooooo

I would be livid with him saying that.

When you e collected your thoughts and go home I would be seriously reminding him you have always worked full
Time as well as bringing up the kids and had it been down to him you would all be fucked because he's worked away and not been there to be the physical other parent so you've been both.

I would also tell
Him how much his scathing comments have hurt and you will see your family as and when you want and he can fuck off.

Thank you.

It’s such a shock to think that he resents me over money. Especially when it feels like we rarely have any!

I have a much stronger relationship with my mum in comparison to him with his parents. I don’t think he understands why I am when we don’t live close. I don’t know!

I don’t want to leave. But I don’t want to live with someone who resents me, which is how it feels

We’ll the argument ended up with him saying that I’d rather be with my family and I’m only with him for his money and to be ‘kept’

Hmm. No comment on the family business but exH called me a gold digger (spectacularly bad choice on my part if true) despite me working FT and it turned out he was - how can I put this?- listening to someone who had turned his head (along with her friends).

I really hope that's not the case and he's just exaggerating how much you see them for some reason.