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Original poster

Am I passing up a good thing?

6 replies

Kiki29 · 20/05/2023 20:16

Hi

so I met this man a few weeks ago and he’s been nothing but kind and loving towards me. We get on very well and I’m very comfortable with him. He has started to ask me if I would like to make a go of things and be in a relationship with him.

My issue is I became a mum at 19 and dedicated myself to being at home with her for 5 years. I had a bad break up with her father but I got back into work last year and my career is going very well and I’ve started to do my engineering degree also. For the first time in a long time I’ve started focusing on me. I’m scared if I get into a relationship it may alter things but I can’t also help thinking that this guy could be something special and I could say goodbye to something special.

I feel very selfish in a way and know I need to have a conversation with him but I don’t know how

OP posts:
ZekeZeke · 20/05/2023 20:24

Just have some fun as boyfriend/girlfriend. Doesn't have to be too heavy.

Seaoftroubles · 20/05/2023 20:55

You are overthinking this, you have only been seeing this guy for a few weeks so why not just relax and enjoy dating? It might lead somewhere, it might not, but if you like him just take it at a pace you are comfortable with and see where it leads.

Kelab · 20/05/2023 21:04

Its only been a few weeks, just be honest. If you feel like you don't want to be dating or sleeping with other people then perhaps you could have that conversation with him and see where he's at with that and just take things slow.

Alcemeg · 20/05/2023 21:22

Can't you do both?

Pinkbonbon · 20/05/2023 22:11

I'm actually going to argue contrary - if you feel your life is good right now, what value is there in turning it upside down for some guy you barely know? Why not just stay single?

I'd understand if it was someone you worked with and over time you fell in love so it was worth the gamble.

But as is, if you like your life as is, being single, why change that.

You already have a kid, you know how badly relationships can go wrong and it doesn't seem you're struggling with being single...I don't understand the point in changing that.

I'm not saying we should all be single. Just that if you're happy single and it's a point in your life where youre focusing on yourself...why risk that good life for some random bloke?

Pinkbonbon · 20/05/2023 22:14

I mean, I could say 'why not just treat it as light and fun?' But let's face it, who hasn't been in something that started out that way ...and then became a powdered pain in the ass? xD

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