For context - been together nearly a year (this time) we were together around a year and a half with a 6 month gap. Im 32 hes 43.
Today'a problem - I said 'hello dear' to him via message this morning - he's hardly spoken to me all day because he's heard me call a man I've worked with for years and years this in the past. (We both worked with him briefly, he's part of our friend group)
We've chatted today - but it's been very apparent he's been 'off'. Tonight he told me why. I apologised to him first thing this morning anyway when he said he didn't like it straight off, and assumed we'd moved on. After he said it tonight, I apologised again, and said in fairness I get it, I heard you speak to 'X' the other day and it sounded a bit familiar: but I just thought I was being over sensitive so I didn't mention it. Now I'm in the wrong for mentioning that because I'm retaliating, I'm throwing stuff at him that's happened in the past and his response now is 'don't worry about it' 'na, doesn't matter'. Is this normal behaviour? I'm often told by him that I don't use terms of endearment for him enough, I never say nice things to him. And I thought I was this morning and that was wrong. This seems like quite a small thing when I write it but I just don't know what to do, he's genuinely lovely a lot of the time and buys me lovely gifts and checks in on my but the more things happen the more I can't help feeling like I'm dating a narcissist and the gifts and nice things are to numb the pain when things are said and the controlling behaviour takes place.
Advice please!