Hello,
My partner and I bought a house together a few months ago and we were trying to conceive. We went through a rocky patch and pledged to put maximum effort into rebuilding the relationship. The result was me trying and him rejecting my efforts. I decamped to a hotel for a few days before being asked to go back home for a chat. I said I’ll only go back on condition there is still love for me and he still sees a future. He said yes… however, a few minutes in we had a horrible argument and he said he hasn’t loved me in a while, he isn’t sure he even wants kids now and he wants to continue smoking (even though I can’t stand it and he didn’t used to). He was very adamant and ended things, saying there was no way back. I left the next morning to my parents’.
Since then we’ve had some amicable discussions about what to do about the house and beloved pets. It’s been expressed that despite the finality of the final argument, he’d like to leave doors open as far as our relationship goes and to meet on neutral ground in a week or so to have a chat.
I am so confused as we’ve been in a loving relationship for 4 years. I don’t recognise this behaviour and coupled with some other signs such as lack of motivation and inability to get out of bed a lot, I am concerned it’s a mid-life crisis or depression. I feel like I’m prepared to hear him out but of course family and friends who have seen me distraught are telling me to run for the hills. Has anyone been through something similar and if so, what would you advise? Thank you!