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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Sexting.

4 replies

OSunt2123 · 15/05/2023 18:58

Me and my partner have had issues,
He has changed since Covid, and he's been depressed for a while but not willing to get help or make life changes, we have been awful for the last few months, and had many conversations about ending it, but have ultimately stayed together.

We had a conversation last week, where I cried and told me he's so cold to me, he lets me down a lot etc and that I don't know what else to do to make him happier
He has 0 friends and 0 life outside of the family and I've supported him so so much.

He's been distant, not romantic and we have been fighting a lot, we have 2 babies under the age of 2. My friends boyfriend cheated and I told her 'I could bet a limb my Oh would never in a million years do anything even close to that'

Fast forward 24 hours, he's phone bleeps and he's been sexting a girl with images and videos for over a month now, and arranging to meet her for sex in the future.
The utter shock has taken me and all I know back, and I feel he has stabbed me through the heart when I've been going through hell to help him be better. The worst bit is, someone from work gained a crush on me and I thought I liked him, I told my partner and shut it down - the whole time he was doing this. I now know that crush was just someone giving me attention, that he was giving to another.
How do you class sexting? I'm terrified to be a single mother

OP posts:
TooManyAnimals94 · 15/05/2023 19:02

What a shit situation, I really feel for you. Sexting is cheating but it sounds like the tip of the iceberg of issues.
If you want to work things through and he's prepared to change then there's no harm in trying but don't stay with him because you're scared to be a single parent. It is scary, but it's better than being in an unloving, unsupportive relationship.

Deathbyfluffy · 15/05/2023 19:03

What an awful situation - honestly it sounds like you’re better off without each other.
For you to develop feelings for someone else means you were already looking elsewhere, as is he by sexting - it’s time to call it a day IMO

OSunt2123 · 15/05/2023 19:10

TooManyAnimals94 · 15/05/2023 19:02

What a shit situation, I really feel for you. Sexting is cheating but it sounds like the tip of the iceberg of issues.
If you want to work things through and he's prepared to change then there's no harm in trying but don't stay with him because you're scared to be a single parent. It is scary, but it's better than being in an unloving, unsupportive relationship.

Your right, I think we both struggle with our kids and lack of sleep it's left no time for us resulting in thinking the grass will be greener, the difference is in my case I was honest, and he didn't care, because he was doing this to me, and the messages are disgusting, just so heartbroken

OP posts:
Shivvy120 · 17/05/2023 09:46

Sexting is a precursor to cheating, and some might define sexting as cheating. I definitely would. He is texting with intent to meet.
Why is it always after the woman has their babies for them that they show this shitty side?

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