Hi I’d like to start this off by saying this post might be a bit long and cover quite a few different problems
the main one I’ll call ‘childish’ so this is a problem me and my partner have been trying to solve over and over. Somting I act more childish or cutesy and this is in contrast to how I am usually and my partener who doesn’t like change receives a big impact from this .Problem is I don’t realise I’m doing it and although I’ve been trying to catch myself I can’t always do it this is understandably really difficult for my partner who doesn’t understand why I can’t just stop it. I have been trying to find patterns and without much luck but I have a few things of which it tends to happen when I’m not feeling good or want to cry but an in a setting or with person I don’t feel comfortable it could also have a like to the fact I use too ‘regress’ which I would change to a more child like version of me as a form of healing. Any info or possible ideas would be appreciated
another issue is our ‘problem solution cycle’ the issue is although we try to communicate there are times and situations when a problem results in a breakdown or anger from my partner about somthing I am /am not doing . Often times I just simply didn’t think to do or not do said things and I feel incredibly guilty and begin to break down myself. Unfortunately I have the more panicked breakdown and my partner steps in to help me get through it and by the time I’ve calmed my partner has collected there thoughts and we try to think of a solution (I must admit often proposed by them) and although this seems too work out for the best I feel horrible for making my partner get to that bad a point for me to notice and I feel like I’m not doing a good job at comforting them when I should be. How do I stop it getting to that point?