Getting over a love Triangle

[VirgoQueen]

I have split up with someone last year when I found out they were in another relationship with a woman 20 yrs their Senior. Dating us both at the same time. We were together for nearly 2 yrs and neither her nor me suspected a thing. Turns out he has done this to her before(they have been together 9yrs). She took him back again on this occassion.

I'm so angry about it all. Part of my anger stems from the fact that they are behaving like everything is brilliant and happy days, when he has really hurt someone else (me). The other part is that her taking him back, means someone else will get hurt in the future. And he was awfully abusive to me.

It doesn't make sense why he was so abusive and jealous towards me when he had her anyway. Why abuse me. Feel like I've pulled the short end of the straw being abused and cheated on yet he gets away with it all without zero repurcusions.

It sounds like you have dodged a bullet to be honest. I feel sorry for his older woman. She's taken him back twice now after he's cheated on her? Her standards must be low.

Try and see this relationship ending as a blessing rather than a curse. You deserve better than this.

I agree with polly, you are better off without this loser and if she keeps taking him back more fool her.

Don't try to make sense of it or his behaviour, just be glad to have found out and be well rid.

How come you didn’t dump him for being awfully abusive? That’s far worse than him nobbing other women. (Not that either are acceptable). Have you been STD tested? Done work on your self esteem? Celebrate removing the scum from your life.

Yeah as much as this stings you need to own your own self esteem and accepting his abuse

im not saying this to kick you when you are down
we’ve all been there and it’s sucks

But the faster you shift to’ how the fuck did I tolerate that ‘- and the faster you can move to having stronger boundaries x

and it can’t be brilliant happy days
shes been cheated on multiple times
and he’s morally messed and sexually incontinent

Thank you for the replies. I really needed to let it out on here although I have been in therapy as well. I have walked away several times, however continued to be reeled in by apologies and future faking. Have learned my lesson.

The hot and cold behaviour during the relationship placed me in trauma bond. I never had any issues with walking away from anything or any person before that disrespected me in any way, but this, really was a mind f**k