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Original poster

Husband talking to another woman

11 replies

peahe123 · 29/04/2023 22:25

Have no one to talk too and need advice. I done a bad thing and looked at my husband phone.. I know I shouldn't have.

On his Snapchat I found he has been talking to another woman, starting off with replying to her pictures like 'hot' 'sexy' etc. then he said a few things like 'wanna spoon?' And another one said 'I'm booking you in as my affair lol'

I am heartbroken and don't know what to do, we have been married 4 years and have a 6month old son together.

I'm worried to confront him as I shouldn't of looked.

What would you do??

OP posts:
Twopoodlesarebetterthanone · 29/04/2023 22:27

Oh no that's bad. You must have suspected to have been looking?

What do you want to do?

PeaceLilyCactus · 29/04/2023 22:30

Take screen shots on your phone so you have proof once you decide what you want to do. He’ll probably delete them at some point and claim you’re a liar.

PopGoesTheProsecco · 29/04/2023 22:34

Why did you look at his phone? Did you suspect something? Not judging (Speaking as someone who looked at my ExH’s phone and found out he’d cheated).

Hopelessromatic · 29/04/2023 22:45

Take screen shots of the text messages. Please don't confront him yet as he will only deny and say it was a bit of harmless fun . Keep checking his phone every night or wherever you can and take screen shots of any more messages until you get enough proof . Don't let him know your any bit suspicious or he may change his password. Keep things normal as I said until you get proof .

MissedItByThisMuch · 30/04/2023 00:32

Why is MN so obsessed with “proof”? It’s not a court of law, she doesn’t need proof. And it doesn’t matter why she looked at his phone. She has seen more than enough to know that at the very least the intent to cheat is there, and quite possibly the actuality.

OP your choices are to ignore this, go on as you are and accept he’s a cheat; or confront him and see what his reaction is. This course of action will most likely mean you need to leave him, if his reaction is to lie or blame you - in fact anything short of absolute remorse and a commitment to change. If you’re not ready for that either financially or emotionally it’s fine to wait, but I’d use that time getting things in place to leave if you need to.

JoanThursday1972 · 30/04/2023 00:50

MissedItByThisMuch · 30/04/2023 00:32

Why is MN so obsessed with “proof”? It’s not a court of law, she doesn’t need proof. And it doesn’t matter why she looked at his phone. She has seen more than enough to know that at the very least the intent to cheat is there, and quite possibly the actuality.

OP your choices are to ignore this, go on as you are and accept he’s a cheat; or confront him and see what his reaction is. This course of action will most likely mean you need to leave him, if his reaction is to lie or blame you - in fact anything short of absolute remorse and a commitment to change. If you’re not ready for that either financially or emotionally it’s fine to wait, but I’d use that time getting things in place to leave if you need to.

Because he could lie his backside off and say she's made it all up and is crazy.

MissedItByThisMuch · 30/04/2023 01:02

JoanThursday1972 · 30/04/2023 00:50

Because he could lie his backside off and say she's made it all up and is crazy.

Show quote history

Well yes, obviously 🙄 but so what?? She knows what she saw and it can really only mean one thing, she can leave him for any or no reason at any time, what is the advantage to her in snooping around collecting absolute “proof”? I can see what the advantage is to drama-loving, emotional vampire MN readers, but aren’t we supposed to be helping OP not creating drama for ourselves?

Aquamarine1029 · 30/04/2023 01:16

What would you do??

I have his bags packed for him by the time he got home from work.

Toiletfriend · 30/04/2023 01:19

Divorces are no fault. It doesn't matter who did what. No proof of anything required.

Aquamarine1029 · 30/04/2023 01:23

JoanThursday1972 · 30/04/2023 00:50

Because he could lie his backside off and say she's made it all up and is crazy.

Show quote history

No one will give a fuck what he says. The op has seen everything she needs to.

Abacusporttaco · 30/04/2023 06:48

You’re not the one who’s done the bad thing…

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