I think I just need a handhold. DH drinking has got increasingly worse. Last night he had a total vodka binge and fell asleep snoring loudly in my ears when he finally stumbled to bed. Every time he does this I’m terrified he’ll fall down the stairs or hit his head, etc. He says he is going to get help but never does. I’ve stopped rescuing and offering advice and support. I don’t feel seen and treated like a wife should be.
Today I went out on a social outing, I’ve not had the confidence to do this for ages. Come home and I’d left my lunch on the table which I’d not managed to eat. I’d gone to get my phone in another room and he’d put my lunch in the bin. He thought it was rubbish but hadn’t asked me. I was really cross and upset as I thought he’d ask before disposing but he couldn’t understand this and stormed off.
He’s got increasingly aggressive in the way he has spoken to me, calling me unreasonable, saying I make his life hard. It really hurt me so I said I didn’t want to go out for an evening meal with him and the children. His reaction was to scream he’d had enough, storm out and say he is staying at his parents house, which he needs to sort as both are recently deceased. I’m aware some may say this is his grief but he’s been like this for years, critical of me, stonewalling, blocking my calls. This evening I was really worried he’d do something stupid and begged him to ring me back which he did, said he’d be back in the morning and reminded me how much I’d ruined his life.
I feel stunned this evening, I’m not in love anymore but I do still get scared for him with his erratic behaviour. My family live abroad and if they knew, I’m really not sure whether they’d be able to help. Luckily the children were out but this behaviour is seen and will be hurting them.
Please help!