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Original poster

Please wish me luck

49 replies

AnyaMarx · 28/04/2023 01:03

Almost 4 years single with a couple of flings I did t know we're flings else
Wouldn't have gone there

I've been chatting for 2 years to a guy who seems lovely .
His job fascinates me . He's kind . He works with animals . (Think sort of stunt man with animals !)

I've finally agreed to meet him coronation weekend .

Pluses .
Kind . Appears to want similar things to me . Kids are adults as are mine . Owns horses which I love . Job is a fascinating and he's a wee bit famous .

Cons
He is literally 2 inches taller than me
He a bit flabby and keeps sending me alluring pictures of him in bed which are if honest anything but alluring

Should I just go with a date ? And see ? He's so nice and we've been talking so long now .....
What if I don't fancy him ?
God being single is so much easier !!!!

OP posts:
SimoneSimone · 29/04/2023 05:48

You don't sound like much of a catch either, especially expecting tall dark and handsome for yourself. You don't like this dude physically, stop wasting his and your time. Find your tall, slim, hairless guy, good luck!

Henbags · 29/04/2023 06:10

You’re really overthinking this. Just go on the date. Or you’ll always wonder! Then if it doesn’t go the way you’d like, just say it was lovely to meet you but I just want to be friends!

SorePaw · 29/04/2023 06:22

@AnyaMarx why has he been happy to just chat for two years? Is he looking for a real relationship or not? How far apart do you live?

ANiceBigCupOfTea · 29/04/2023 06:27

AnyaMarx · 28/04/2023 19:56

We haven't met before now because I just wasn't ready for anything after coming out of a very painful break up from someone I thought was my one - and I'd had a still birth in my mid 40s which consumed me for a time and I just really couldn't be arsed with another relationship.
But I feel I've healed , had a couple of short lived flings after the break up which just confirmed I was t ready for anything.
Now I've been single 4 years and just feel a little more optimistic but I ditched all dating sites a while ago and have been happily throwing myself into single life , taken up new hobbies, forced myself out more with friends etc .

We just got chatting again (we've always been in touch but sporadic) and things progressed to us actuality arranging to meet .
But just the pics keep putting me off ....he's nice in clothes 😂.

We also have a common interest so I just threw caution to the wind and arranged dinner next week .

I'm so sorry ❤️
I've been through that too so you have my deepest sympathy.
If you're not feeling it, you're not feeling it. However a nice dinner or laugh over a few drinks might not hurt at the same time. Do what you feel is right.

ExhaustedPigwidgeon · 29/04/2023 06:28

Two years? That is not dating territory that’s just a pen friend. Don’t bother meeting up with him you’ll just be wasting his time

onwardsup4 · 29/04/2023 10:32

Passmethpens · 28/04/2023 19:43

ahh I’d go on the date.
it’s only a date.
Go and see how things go… give yourselves a chance for goodness sake

This ! Just meet him , good luck !

Watchkeys · 29/04/2023 11:15

ExhaustedPigwidgeon · 29/04/2023 06:28

Two years? That is not dating territory that’s just a pen friend. Don’t bother meeting up with him you’ll just be wasting his time

How do you know?

GreyCarpet · 29/04/2023 16:16

He's 51. What exactly did you expect to find under his clothes..??

Original poster
AnyaMarx · 29/04/2023 17:41

No im 51 . He is younger .

And someone has misquoted me in tall dark and handsome to tall bald and slim ....

What is wrong with you ?

I have very clearly said it's the pictures I don't find attractive not the man .

I am very scared to date again after the loss of my last relationship and my daughter . (Still born)

Wtf is it with people who just seem to want to put the boot in ?
This used to
Be a board that was women helping and supporting other women primarily- now it's just bitchy . !

Thanks to those who said take a punt . Im going to .
If we don't have chemistry we've lost nothing and if we do , we'll I'll go from there .

He lives a little way off so I've asked if f he would like my spare room and then we can go to a coronation party together following day but f things go well.
I do like him , I find him funny and kind , patient and things have been flirty in a nice way - it's just the "sexy" pics that sort of made me wonder that the hell he thought he was doing or if seeing his torso would make me think snts toy want to rip his clothes off

Dunno . But I've said he is welcome to the spare , with no expectations please - we talk fine so I'm pretty sure it won't be awkward. I'm very gregarious and fizzy and he is a showman so I think we'll have a laugh 😂 f nothing else .

Now I've a week to talk myself out of it .

OP posts:
Original poster
AnyaMarx · 29/04/2023 17:44

He's closer to 50 than 40 but still a good few years younger than me .

OP posts:
Passmethpens · 29/04/2023 19:36

Do not start talking yourself out of it

AAAAABBBBBCCCCC · 29/04/2023 19:48

Tell him to stop sending the pics then. As you've not said anything, he probably thinks you enjoy them.

Original poster
AnyaMarx · 30/04/2023 20:00

How do
You say tho "please stop sending me the pics it's putting me right off ! " without deflating an ego !?

OP posts:
BitOutOfPractice · 30/04/2023 20:02

Why the hell have you been chatting for two years without meeting?

BitOutOfPractice · 30/04/2023 20:04

I mean I don’t think waiting two years to even meet up I’d throwing caution to the wind 😂

bluevelvetbox · 30/04/2023 20:54

Please don't let a stranger stay over in your house.

Original poster
AnyaMarx · 30/04/2023 21:56

BitOutOfPractice · 30/04/2023 20:02

Why the hell have you been chatting for two years without meeting?

Ffs does no one read tft?

OP posts:
Original poster
AnyaMarx · 30/04/2023 21:57

bluevelvetbox · 30/04/2023 20:54

Please don't let a stranger stay over in your house.

It's fine . I know I'm safe with him - he's got the spare double .

OP posts:
Original poster
AnyaMarx · 30/04/2023 21:58

BitOutOfPractice · 30/04/2023 20:02

Why the hell have you been chatting for two years without meeting?

I've answered this twice . It's not a long thread .

OP posts:
bluevelvetbox · 30/04/2023 21:59

AnyaMarx · 30/04/2023 21:57

It's fine . I know I'm safe with him - he's got the spare double .

Show quote history

How do you know if you've never met him? Please be careful.

Original poster
AnyaMarx · 30/04/2023 22:29

I'll be really careful. But I'm sure he's a gent .
He is welcome to
My spare room

OP posts:
Seaoftroubles · 01/05/2023 00:20

Meet him, but make it a coffee date rather than a meal, just in case you don't want to prolong it. Please do not invite him into your home to stay over night. He is an online stranger no matter how long you've been chatting.You dont know him so please be careful. Also ask him to stop sending you topless pics, just say you don't like it!

Passmethpens · 01/05/2023 07:33

AnyaMarx · 30/04/2023 20:00

How do
You say tho "please stop sending me the pics it's putting me right off ! " without deflating an ego !?

Wait until you’re already chatting, compliment him on the photos where he’s clothed, with horses etc and say why you like those. You look so good in your work gear getting stuck in with the horses for example…. Let him enjoy that compliment, and then add that you much prefer to see those photos than bedroom ones. They’ve never really done it for you, from anyone!

Fenellapitstop · 01/05/2023 23:43

Just go meet him and see. It's been two years, there's got to be something there x

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