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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Can we really be friends?

2 replies

Emmaer78 · 23/04/2023 13:40

So my ex and I separated just over a week ago after 27 years. We have 3 children, 2 left home and our 12 year at home with me.
We'd had problems for a while, little cracks started to show about 6 months ago when our middle daughter moved out (I now have a beautiful grandson 💙)

We just simply fell out of love, the only thing we have in common is the love for our children. We have never had the same interests but just seemed to gel and work well together as parents.
He has since moved out, he still has a lot of his stuff here, 27 years worth of memories and just stuff!
I have no problem storing it until he finds a place of his own. He's in regular contact with all our children especially our son. He has visited almost daily which really doesn't bother me. I'm not in love with him and vice versa. Don't get me wrong there where tears at the beginning because I'll always love him. Then after a few days we had a huge argument and he said some horrible things. The next day he apologised and said he felt it would be easier if I hated him. (This was his choice to leave) but here's the thing. I don't hate him. I just want us to be the best parents we can be to our children while being amicable and just friends.

Can we be friends and have a good friendship. Does this sort of thing even happen?

OP posts:
Doversole7 · 23/04/2023 13:56

Yes you can but you will find when your youngest is an adult, you have very little reason to be. New partners often muddy the waters too.

Emmaer78 · 23/04/2023 14:26

Too be honest, future relationships are the last thing I've thought about. I was 18 when we first got together, so I've never lived on my own, never been on my own I guess.

I'd like to think once our son is of an age to leave home there will be no animosity regarding new partners and such. :)

OP posts:
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