7 year relationship 2 DC one 2 one 8 months. Relationship has been rocky at times but ultimately we love eachother and I can never see myself with anyone else. He loves the kids. He has a severely ASD son from previous relationship who I was really close to when small but through kicking out when pregnant etc I've had to take a back seat and this has took a toll where we can no longer even be in the same room without me triggering him into lashing out at me or my children.
This is a massive strain as partner is very much a blame the autism parent and avoid the meltdown
Things have been pretty shit since Xmas. We're have some really good times but I feel like I do everything. I'm a SAHM I contribute 50% financially although he earns 3x as much. I don't know exactly how much he earns as it's not really anything to do with me apparently. I pay all the kids expenses.
My MH has taken a dip and I feel myself thinking I'm not good enough for my partner. He seems to think I should be happy looking after him and the family home as that's my job now. I always ask about his day etc but if I talk about mine and the kids he sits scrolling He loves working and regularly takes overtime on weekdays and weekends so alot of the time it's just me and them. I'm basically living like a single parent.
He also smokes* and refuses any help or admits atall that it massively impacts his moods bad ones where he says I'm a shit mum and I should be grateful etc. When we do have the kids he just falls asleep on the sofa doesn't want to go out etc so I end up taking them myself anyway which I absoloutley love they are genuinely my life.
Anyway I basically feel like I'm staying in this for me and being selfish / cowardly and ultimately I need to leave for the sake of my children. Is this the case or is this the life of a SAHM?