To have tick boxes

[CaterpillarShark]

What would be on your ‘list’ of wants in a husband given your age and ‘stage’?

when I was in my 20s, this was my list:

• intelligent
• tall
• broad
• hairy
• capacity to earn enough to support a family
• desire to get married
• desire to have (multiple) children

now I’m older, this is my list:

• kind
• broad
• solvent
• fun-loving
• healthy

i married early on, using list #1 and DH would fall short on list #2!

Did you get the kids though?
Wanting kids, intelligent and funny were probably my top 3 in my 20s.

We have kids now but I would add active as important too.

Attractive
Compatible sex drives
Enjoy each others' company

What does attractive mean though?

what stage of life are you?

Own hair
Own teeth
Kind
Patient
Polite
Glass 1/2 full attitude
No gambling
Limited drinking
Homeowner
Car owner
Employed

Mine would have been something along the lines of:
Tall and skinny
Hard working and intelligent
Kind
Wants to get married and have kids in the future

And now it's pretty much just:
Kind and supportive
Sensible with money

Luckily DH meets the requirements on both!

Handsome
Ambitious
Earning power
No addictions
Wants kids
Fair and kind
Charitable

Someone who makes me happy.

I met my husband at 17, he ticked all my boxes of intelligence, good humour, kindness, can cook, wanted kids, makes me happy back then and still does in our 30s.

I find them sexually attractive

They make me laugh

We don't argue

They are capable of doing their own life stuff

Ex doesn't tick any except the first. Current DP ticks them all.

My list would be:

Outdoorsy/nature lover
Likes animals
Kind and empathetic
Open to new ideas and different ways of thinking
Politically left leaning
Decent teeth
Good hygiene
Financially secure
No addictions/no smoking/not a big drinker
No young children (grown up kids ok)

A big bear of a man who is:

Kind
Gentle
Funny
Solvent
Healthy
Already happy with life
Doesn't feel the need to be joined at the hip
Understands my need for time alone
If he has children, that they're adults

This is for me in my fifties and happily single. They'd need to complement my already happy life rather than add complications.

1. Enjoy being single

🙂

Mine hasn't changed from my 20s to mid/late 30s:
. Tidy
. Warm and friendly
. Responsible
. Mostly easy going and affable, but passionate about something.
. Has hobbies and supports me to do mine
. Independent, especially around his parents. No bigger ick for me than a grown man whose mum still mothers him.

In mid 40s mine are:
Decent/trustworthy/loyal
Integrity/hard-working
Curious minded/intelligent
Determined/not flakey
Supportive/respectful/Compassionate
Makes me laugh
I find them attractive
Embraces family life

DH ticks all but one of these.

Back in 20s it would have been very much more focused on romantic feelings and looks. I also wouldn't have prioritised common interests and while I believe this is helpful it's not on my list because I think you can have a great relationship with different interests.

I would have prioritised common interests, that was meant to say

I love this list!