DP is making an effort but I still want to leave

[NoraLuka]

I feel like a cow.

Last week I told DP that I wanted to split up partly because I feel like I’m always doing all the housework, shopping, cooking etc. He has way more free time than I do because I have (teenage) DC and he doesn’t. He gets on ok with the DC but doesn’t have any kind of stepfather role. Basically I’ve had enough of being in a relationship with him and can’t summon the motivation to do anything about it.

He was upset when I told him and said he’d make an effort, and he really has but it’s not making any difference. I’ve told him loads of times before how I was tired and wanted help with stuff but he just grumbled and didn’t do anything. I just want to

Posted too soon by accident.

Just wanted to ask if anyone has been in this situation and if it’s possible to fall back in love when you just feel meh about a person, even though objectively they are a good person.

No, you won't fall back in love. Cut your losses and send him on his way.

And you can. You don't need anyone's permission.

Your feelings are absolutely understandable. You'd told him before that you weren't happy and he ignored you. He only took any notice when you threatened to leave him (ie it's going to make HIM uncomfortable). He wasn't happy to adapt in any way for your benefit / happiness, but he's going to make an effort to preserve his own comfort.

If he can change, why didn't he do it before when you told him you weren't happy?

He isn't doing this for the 'right' reasons, so it won't last.

And in any case, even if he's a reformed character - it doesn't stop the fact that he's let you do all the work and he's destroyed the love you had for him.

Can't you have a relationship but live apart, then he'll have to tidy up after himself.