Been together 24 years , 2 children preteen and teen .
Husband has been pursuing his own dreams for a few years .Walking holidays , building career .
I became stay at home mum , unpaid help .
I love my children and don't want to leave them in his care . He is quite selfish and quick tempered and I often have to step in to resolve conflict .
I decided on Saturday to take some time . I went out for afternoon with a friend . He often does this , says he works all week and likes to take himself off for a walk or too a friends . Sometimes he sits in another room watching his tv drinking a beer and falls asleep .
I return home before bed .
Yesterday we went out as a family , it was tense and he was sharp so our teen told him off for how he spoke to me. I didn't challenge her .
Last night I went to bed early because I have a health condition and was I pain . Don't often do this , but children were settled . Eldest in room , youngest in bedroom next door talking to friends on iPad .
I was woken at 9pm by him putting tv on , then I realised my youngest 9 was crying by bed asking to say goodnight to me . He was telling her to get to bed in a not nice tone . I got up to comfort her and put her to bed . She said Dad had shouted at her to go to bed when she was on iPad with friends and she was embarrassed. She said he refused to do hot water bottle or drink and just put her in bed and that's why she was upset .
I took hot water bottle to him in bed and asked if he could fill it while I settled her . This turned into s shouting match , him refusing then marching through to her room to challenge her lies . She said he had asked her 3 times but it was holidays and only 9 o'clock.
I slept in her room because she asked me too , eldest asked to be left alone
I don't want to be with him anymore , he has the short temper but pushes it into me
I've cried all night and children have seen it , I can't stop the tears and feel so guilty
He's asleep of course and today will be all my fault