Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Anyone else with a low sex drive in early 30s?

2 replies

ChangedMyNameAgainAgain · 08/04/2023 22:23

I'm only 32 but I feel like I'd be quite happy to never have sex again. DH is actually really good in bed, very attentive and eager to please. I just feel like there are so many things I'd rather be doing! It feels like a massive chore. It's not him - I don't think I'd want to have sex with anyone else either.

Major disclaimer - we have two DC under 4, so life is knackering at the moment. I've also gone on antidepressants since they were born, which I know can have a major impact on libido. However, they've been so life-changing that I'm not willing to mess about with them, plus my sex drive was probably lower than average even before that anyway.

I have told DH that my drive is very low these days, and we had quite a chat about it. He suggested that since his drive is high and he could happily have sex every day, it should mainly be me initiating so that I don't feel pressured when I'm not in the mood. He is a brilliant partner and I want him to feel loved and satisfied, so I do "fake it" and make the effort a couple of times each week. I usually do end up enjoying it and having an orgasm. But I'd still rather be watching TV or reading a good book! Is anyone else like this? Is it likely to improve as the DC get older? Not sure why I'm writing this really. I just wonder if it's only me!

OP posts:
Doversole7 · 08/04/2023 23:37

No it’s not just you. I am similar. Never been much a of a priority for me.

HarpendenHarpendenHarpenden · 09/04/2023 09:00

If you previously enjoyed it, it probably is your antidepressants.

There's one called Trazodone (SARI) which can increase your sex drive, if it's really bothering you. There's also Imipramine (or another tricyclic) which doesn't have an effect on your sex drive that I've noticed.

I definitely appreciate not wanting to stop taking antidepressants but maybe the one you're on isn't right for you. I had similar effects and spoke to my GP who specialises in mental health and he suggested Trazodone.

Might be worth chatting to your GP. We're all different so what works for me might not work for you. But it seems the ones you are taking are affecting you negatively. It can't be nice for you to be having sex when you don't want to.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page