I need help quickly!

[seabreezy]

If ex turns up still drunk and on gear to collect the kids what am I meant to do?!!!
Do I have to let them go with him so I'm not disrupting his time with them? Am I allowed to say no you are unfit to have them?
Please advise as I think this will end up down the lines of court and I don't want to see as the bad person for not letting my girls be at risk.

You do not let them go

It really doesn't matter if he makes you the bad person, whatever happens next pales in the insignificance in the face of keeping your children safe.

You don't let them go. I have checked this myself.

No, never ever place your kids at risk.
Good luck.

I'd be interested in this too
When this does happen how do you prove it has happened ? How do you prove he's not fit to look after them ?

I would like to know this too as otherwise how can I prove it later down the line than it not being a he said she said thing.

What is primary is protecting your kids from harm , duty of care etc.
There have to be terms and conditions to protect minors.

Hi OP, how do you know he will be unfit? Do you have any evidence? Texts ect. This may help. I would say do not let them go if you are concerned and deal with the back lash later

I know when he turns up stinking of alcohol and what he's like when on gear. We broke up 3 weeks ago due to him taking gear and bringing it back to the house so I ended things. I think I'll have my phone on record but other than that I don't know how to prove it?

I bought a breathalyser
I doubt he'd agree to take it if i challenged him but then if he doesn't then I'll refuse to let him take ds

Absolutely do not let them go. If this likely to continue, I'd perhaps consider a ring doorbell so that it's recorded. You're doing the right thing, don't doubt that at all!

I wish I'd taken videos of the states he was in early mornings before i threw him out but hindsight is a wonderful thing
I've made a lot of mistakes when it comes to this I'm the past

If he turns up looking worse for wear then don't let him take the kids and call the police if he's threatening. There will then be something on the record about his behaviour and a report if the police do need to attend. If he just goes quietly then great your kids are safe but you might want to think about a conversation with social services on Monday.
Good luck OP

Could you place your phone propped up somewhere discretely and record a video?

If he kicks off call the police so there’s a record of your fear for the girls, and hopefully they will be able to corroborate his state in any report

If you only broke up 3 weeks ago has visitation been agreed via the courts already?

If not then you are under no legal obligation to hand your children over surely?
Tell him to take you to court for access.

Do not let them go. Make copious notes on his appearance and behaviour at the time. Phone the police and seek their advice so there is a record if he’s difficult. But do not let them go if you suspect they’re at risk.

You say, please leave, you aren't in a fit state to take the children. Please see a solicitor as I don't trust you to parent them adequately if you think this is OK.
Stop the contact, ring police if he won't leave and is kicking off.
You won't be looked at badly for not letting them go with a man unable to care for them. Quite the other way around, if you sent them, I'd be saying what are you playing at, don't you care if they're not safe?

Even if there was an Order, its fine to breach it in this scenario. Exercising your parental responsibility to safeguard

If a parent turns up drunk to collect a child from school, we don't release the child to them. It's a serious safeguarding issue.

Don't let your children go with him.

Absolutely, I just meant as there couldn't be a court order in place so quickly she doesn't need to worry about breaking any rules.

What happened? @seabreezy