Told to off myself

[My3cents1]

I have serious medical conditions that along with physical disabilities effect my brain. I often get very depressed. I do have treatment for this.
I have been with my partner for 12 years and have a dc together.
He will often say vile things to me and about me then complain I have no self esteem. He gets extremely angry at me, pretty much on a daily basis.
This morning I have been very distressed with my disability, it resulted in him screaming at me and telling me I’m thee worst mistake he has ever made, that I have brought him down and I should just off myself. He even offered to drive me to a tall building or get the rope sorted for me.
I know I’m not easy to live with but I just never realized how much I have ruined his life by just being me. Maybe he’s right.

Of course he's not right, you know that really. What isn't right is your relationship. I can guarantee you'd have far better self esteem if you weren't in it and I'd bet your mental health would drastically improve too! You deserve so much better than this.

Oh, he's so not right! He sounds like a piece of abusive shit who makes your mental health much worse. That's such a disgusting thing to say to anyone.

A good partner would see your distress and do all they can to comfort you/ find a way for you to feel more comfortable, not offer to help you kill yourself. That's coerced suicide.

Can you look at making plans to get away from him? You really need to. Women's Aid can help with this.

Please please please call Women’s Aid and get proper help and advice. This is awful and you don’t deserve to be treated like this. It’s never ok.

He's horribly abusive. Please don't harm yourself. Think about ways to leave this horrible relationship. Ring womens aid for support. Take care xx

He’s vile. Is there anywhere that you can go?
I think that you will find that a life away from him is a much better life.

🚩🚩

red flags with bells on.

Please call women's aid, tell them everything. There's a lot of helpful people here that will support you too, but WA will be trained to give the right advice. That must be awful to put up with everyday, you do not deserve it, you haven't ruined his life, you are brave and he is ruining yours.

I'd say report this to the police, he is abusing a disabled person. But speak to WA first, as they have experience.

Wow, what a bastard.

I’m so sorry this is so awful to read that I can’t even imagine how you must be feeling. All I can say is 100% it isn’t you, it’s him. He’s a nasty person and I promise you, your mental health and happiness will VASTLY improve with him no longer in the picture.

Thank you for your kind replies. I know there are others with far worse problems than me. I’m in just such a dark place. I no longer have friends, most of my family are no longer here. I have no one to talk with. I just exist.
I am always being reminded how much he has done for me and I am grateful but how long do I pay the price?
I do nothing right. How I dress, my hair color, my weight. He even mimics my voice so I just shut up. I get ridiculed for crying, I promise myself I will never cry in front of him again but I always fail. Thank you for taking time to read, it’s much appreciated x

This is one of the saddest posts I have read on MN. Agree with all previous comments, he's a vile abuser and you need to get far away from him. Ring WA when you can, they will help you x

This is heartbreaking to read, he is awful OP and you DO NOT deserve this. I am so sorry you are treated like this. He is bringing you down every day.

Tell us about your DC, how old are they?

Other people's problems don't negate yours. You don't have to live this way.

This is awful, I know it's not that easy but I feel like you need to get away from him. And if not maybe he needs to go to therapy. I'm so sorry :(

Please follow this advice, OP. You and DC need to be safe from his abuse. Women’s Aid should help.